The Between Years

one. No matter the cost, he would do nothing to foil this opportunity.

    He checked his watch-only a few hours to go-and he readied himself to meet Kenny again. And when he did, he would put his foot down. He was the boy's father and deserved respect no matter what. But most of all, he would do his damnedest to stop the boy from escaping again. Living inside those walls would be as unhealthy for him as his binge eating. If he could keep him from returning to the walls, he could prove to him that his life would turn around. Nothing would stop him from doing these things, he decided, and he would do them out of love.

CHAPTER 24
    Through it all, we always agreed on one thing: any marriage is worth saving. Yes, there are those that are beyond any possible resuscitation, but one should never be discarded before doing the work. But we didn't reach that conclusion right away. Hell, we didn't even realize we had a legitimate problem yet, but it had been brewing for a while. We later agreed on that too.

    Ever the romantic, Randy sprung a getaway weekend on me at the last minute. He'd said that his grandfather used to surprise his grandmother with vacations, but more because she would have worried herself sick if he hadn't. Though I was glad to go somewhere, I quickly understood why that poor woman hated those surprises.

    We spent a three-day weekend in Cape Cod to try and forget our problems. During the drive, we manufactured as much conversation as we could. Usually the topic turned to our jobs, which we were also supposed to be leaving behind for a few days. Now and then, I needed to use a rest stop, which I figured should be no hassle given that they appear every twenty miles or so along the New York State Thruway and the Mass Pike. Randy scratched his nose and appeared to shake his head, but I couldn't tell for sure. In any event, he'd said nothing. Eventually he pointed our that we could have made it to the Cape faster if we didn't need to check in at every rest stop. I told him that speed wasn't the point, and that we should take advantage of our time together.

    Randy patted my lap, said, “You're right, honey, sorry,” and returned his eyes to the road. Including our stops, we made the trip in seven hours. Randy had researched this charming old bed and breakfast on the waterfront, which we checked into by two in the afternoon. That left us enough time to unpack and freshen up.

    We overslept the first morning, but we still managed to grab our complimentary breakfast in time. Later, we cruised the antique shops but didn't buy anything. We were happy to swing a trip with our budget the way it was.

    Hand-in-hand walks along the beach were my favorite moments of the trip. I loved watching the seagulls fly, particularly at sunset. We stopped the odd time to skip stones into the water, but I needed to grab Randy's attention every time we stopped. To say that his mind was consumed would be an understatement! But I decided not to waste any more time trying to analyze him. That simply wasn't worth the energy. I had no desire to be negative either. We both had knots in our ropes before driving out there, and the change of scenery seemed to untie them for us.

    When we returned home, I thought our efforts were all for naught, because the fighting and bitterness resumed. That told me that we could take all the vacations we wanted, but all our problems would be waiting for us when we returned. Anxiety set in hard and heavy because I thought we'd run dry of options. After a few days passed, I brought up the possibility of seeing a marriage counsellor. Randy was uncomfortable with the idea, and so was I at first. I used to think that marriage counsellors were for people who fooled around or couples that were never meant to be. Then I realized that they are very much for couples who need a hand to make it over the hump and have the happiest marriage possible.

    Before long, I convinced Randy to give it a try. We had two sessions with a counsellor named Doctor Debra, who seemed to be very open, and made me feel like no topic was taboo. She told us that to understand our situation, she needed to know everything, and that no detail should seem minute. First, I explained my side of things, starting from the beginning, and covering the aftermath of Kenny's death. I told her, “Deep down, I want the same things as Randy does, but the situation is too complicated to say we're going to do it on our terms. We have to consider the