The Bride Wore Black Leather

reckoned with. A man on the way up, heading for greatness. I always knew you had it in you, Mr. Taylor. If you’re looking for new members of a new Authorities, once you’ve finished off the others, I would of course be wery honoured . . . I am a man of refined character and a wery successful business man . . .”
    “No you’re not,” said Cathy. “You’re a sleazoid with delusions of grandeur who does mucky things with ghosts. Don’t you go getting ideas above your station.”
    “Well, if you’re not here to see me in my position as a business man, then why?” said Dennis, apparently entirely unmoved by Cathy’s fierce words.
    “Because you were trained by the Carnacki Institute,” I said.
    “You did talk to ghosts, as a field agent, didn’t you?” said Cathy. “When you weren’t trying to touch them inappropriately.”
    Dennis sniggered again. “Those so-called sophisticates running the organisation never did approve of me. Even though I got results no-one else could. Bunch of prudes and Puritans, the lot of them, my dears. Some of us are a little more open to the more interesting opportunities to be found in life and death. Still, what can you expect from an organisation that takes its name from a man who cared more about the dead than he ever did about the living?”
    He stopped talking abruptly as I fixed him with a cold, hard stare. “I was trained by old Carnacki himself, back when I was starting out,” I said. “He was a good man. One more word from you against him, and I will rip the soul right out of you and send it screaming down into Hell.”
    Dennis looked at me uneasily. He wasn’t sure I could actually do that; but he wasn’t sure I couldn’t, either. There are a lot of stories about me running round the Nightside, and I make it a point never to confirm or deny any of them. Because you never know when they might come in handy.
    Dennis scowled, then forced his face back into its usual smarmy good nature. “A splendid fellow, that Mr. Carnacki! A most knowledgeable man, yes. I’ve always said so! Certainly he had enough integrity to walk away from the Institute that bears his name when it let him down.”
    “So he did,” I said. “Now, Den-Den . . . I have need of your assistance.”
    “But of course, Mr. Taylor! You know me! Always happy to help out . . .”
    “I need you to come with me, right now,” I said. “To talk to a ghost, on my behalf.”
    “But . . . but . . . I can’t simply leave the club!” said Dennis. “Not . . . just like that!”
    “There must be somebody here who can run the place while you nip out for a minute,” said Cathy. “Isn’t there anyone here you can trust?”
    “Please,” said Dennis. “Remember where you are.”
    “It’s up to you,” I said. “Either you come along with us, right now, or Cathy can sing a quick chorus of
There’ll be a hot time in the old town tonight
 . . .”
    “I’ll be right with you,” said Dennis. “I knew I should have signed up for fire insurance when I had the chance . . . Let me talk to somebody.”
    “If I even think you’re running for the back door, I will make your knee-caps disappear,” I said.
    “Mr. Taylor! You wound me!”
    “Almost certainly,” I said.
    Dennis sleazed away to talk with the tall, cadaverous figure behind the nasty-looking bar, while I looked thoughtfully at Cathy.
    “When, exactly, did you acquire this reputation for aggressive pyromania? Did I miss something?”
    “Almost certainly,” said Cathy. “You know how it is, boss; you’re out on the town with a few friends, drinking it up; you’re young, you’ve got incendiaries . . . shit happens.”
    Perhaps fortunately, Dennis came back at that moment, giving us both his best professional smile. “All arranged, my dears! Now let us get this all over and done with. Maurice will look after things, in my hopefully short absence. He’ll cheat me on the take, no doubt about it, but better to lose some than all by having to close up. No-one appreciates the trials and tribulations of the honest business man.”
    “Least of all you,” I agreed. I held his gaze firmly with mine. “If I ever find out you’re holding any of these ghost girls against their will . . .”
    Dennis came as close to real laughter as he dared. “Do me a favour, Mr. Taylor! They come to me! They ask for this. Every girl working here is a volunteer. They need the life-force they suck out of the punters