The Perks of Being a Wallflower

one of the girls with the belly button ring, and she seemed like she was in a movie. I started blinking a lot and looking around, and the music sounded heavy like water.
    Sam came down and when she saw me, she turned to Bob.
    “What the hell is your problem?”
    “Come on, Sam. He likes it. Ask him.”
    “How do you feel, Charlie?”
    “Light.”
    “You see?” Bob actually looked a little nervous, which I was later told was paranoia.
    Sam sat down next to me and held my hand, which felt cool.
    “Are you seeing anything, Charlie?”
    “Light.”
    “Does it feel good?”
    “Uh-huh.”
    “Are you thirsty?”
    “Uh-huh.”
    “What would you like to drink?”
    “A milkshake.”
    And everyone in the room, except Sam, erupted in laughter.
    “He’s stoned.”
    “Are you hungry, Charlie?”
    “Uh-huh.”
    “What would you like to eat?”
    “A milkshake.”
    I don’t think they would have laughed any harder even if what I said was at all funny. Then, Sam took my hand and stood me up on the dizzy floor.
    “C’mon. We’ll get you a milkshake.”
    As we were leaving, Sam turned to Bob.
    “I still think you’re an asshole.”
    All Bob did was laugh. And Sam finally laughed, too. And I was glad that everyone seemed as happy as they seemed.
    Sam and I got up to the kitchen, and she turned on the light. Wow! It was so bright, I couldn’t believe it. It was like when you see a movie in the theater during the day, and when you leave the movie, you can’t believe that it’s still daylight outside. Sam got some ice cream and some milk and a blender. I asked her where the bathroom was, and she pointed around the corner almost like it was her house. I think she and Patrick spent a lot of time here when Bob was still in high school.
    When I got out of the bathroom, I heard a noise in the room where we left our coats. I opened the door, and I saw Patrick kissing Brad. It was a stolen type of kissing. They heard me in the door and turned around. Patrick spoke first.
    “Is that you, Charlie?”
    “Sam’s making me a milkshake.”
    “Who is this kid?” Brad just looked real nervous and not in the Bob way.
    “He’s a friend of mine. Relax.”
    Patrick then took me out of the room and closed the door. He put his hands on both of my shoulders and looked me straight in the eye.
    “Brad doesn’t want people to know.”
    “Why?”
    “Because he’s scared.”
    “Why?”
    “Because he is… wait… are you stoned?”
    “They said I was downstairs. Sam is making me a milkshake.”
    Patrick tried to keep from laughing.
    “Listen, Charlie. Brad doesn’t want people to know. I need you to promise that you won’t tell anyone. This will be our little secret. Okay?”
    “Okay.”
    “Thanks.”
    With that, Patrick turned around and went back into the room. I heard some muffled voices, and Brad seemed upset, but I didn’t think it was any of my business, so I went back to the kitchen.
    I have to say that it was the best milkshake I ever had in my life. It was so delicious, it almost scared me.
    Before we left the party, Sam played me a few of her favorite songs. One was called “Blackbird.” The other was called “MLK.” They were both very beautiful. I mentioned the titles because they were as great when I listened to them sober.
    Another interesting thing happened at the party before we left. Patrick came downstairs. I guess Brad had left. And Patrick smiled. And Bob started to make fun of him having a crush on the quarterback. And Patrick smiled more. I don’t think I ever saw Patrick smile so much. Then, Patrick pointed at me, and said something to Bob.
    “He’s something, isn’t he?”
    Bob nodded his head. Patrick then said something I don’t think I’ll ever forget.
    “He’s a wallflower.”
    And Bob really nodded his head. And the whole room nodded their head. And I started to feel nervous in the Bob way, but Patrick didn’t let me get too nervous. He sat down next to me.
    “You see things. You keep quiet about them. And you understand.”
    I didn’t know that other people thought things about me. I didn’t know that they looked. I was sitting on the floor of a basement of my first real party between Sam and Patrick, and I remembered that Sam introduced me as her friend to Bob. And I remembered that Patrick had done the same for Brad. And I started to cry. And nobody in that room looked at me weird for doing it. And then I really started to cry.
    Bob raised his drink and asked everyone to