The Reunion

laughing about something. There were a few guys from college who he’d known vaguely and had no great desire to talk to, there was Lilah, pouring the drinks and flirting with everyone in sight. No sign of Conor, no sign of Jen. He felt disappointed and relieved at the same time.
    Grabbing himself a beer he joined Natalie and Andrew at the table.
    ‘My parents are going away,’ Nat said, ‘some time at the end of June. We should all go. It’ll be fun, we’ll have the place to ourselves. We can have a pool party.’
    Dan grinned. ‘Sounds good,’ he said and then, realising he didn’t sound as enthusiastic as he was supposed to: ‘Sounds great.’ It took him a moment, but he remembered. ‘Congratulations, Nat,’ he said, giving her a kiss on the cheek. ‘Brilliant news on the story.’
    ‘Thank you,’ she said, and she smiled at him and then looked at Andrew, who slid his arm around her shoulders.
    ‘She’s a star, isn’t she?’ he said and Natalie blushed.
    Dan looked up. He saw Lilah, standing in the shadow of the house, watching them, and behind her, Jen and Conor, coming down the kitchen steps, hand in hand. He felt something then that he hadn’t felt in a long time, an anger and envy that he thought he’d left behind. Conor came towards them, leading Jen by the hand, head held high, a wide smile on his face, shoulders dropped, relaxed, confident, Jen just a step behind him, long legs in low heels, grey skirt, crisp white fitted shirt, her hair tied back. She was lovely. Her eyes were lowered, she didn’t look at him when he shook Conor’s hand, she didn’t even look at him when she stepped forward to accept his kiss on her cheek. He had an unbearable urge to grab her by the shoulders, to shake her, to shout, look at me!
    Instead, he turned to Natalie and said: ‘So, this weekend at your place? Can I bring someone?’
    Jen looked at him then: just for a moment, her eyes met his before her lids lowered again. Her cheeks flushed, she took a long slug of her wine.
    ‘Course you can,’ Nat said. ‘Who is she then?’
    They were all looking at him, smiling, expectant. Dan kept his eyes on Jen’s face. ‘Haven’t decided yet,’ he said. ‘Couple of options.’
    Jen’s lips parted a little, as though she was about to say something, then she turned away, kissing Conor lightly on the cheek as she did. ‘God, it’s hot,’ she said, and she walked away.
    Conor and Andrew were in control of the barbecue. Men’s men, slinging slabs of meat onto hot coals. Dan sat to one side, sipping his beer gingerly, listening to Natalie and Lilah chattering away about films they’d seen, a dress Lilah was planning to buy. He tuned out, let his mind drift, but he kept his eye on the steps leading up to the kitchen, waiting for Jen to come back outside. He thought about going in there to find her. He wanted to confront her, he wanted to apologise to her, he wanted
something
. He wanted to be close enough to smell her skin. He finished off his beer and was about to get up to go inside when the girls decided they were going to make some Pimm’s, and the chance to be alone with her was lost.
    Natalie came back out a few minutes later carrying a pitcher and some glasses. She poured him one and perched by his side on the table, asking him questions about Norwich and the girls he’d mentioned, but all the while she was watching Andrew and he felt heartsick for her, for both of them. They were alike, the two of them, they’d never get what they wanted. He looked at her, petite and pretty, hair cropped shorter, making those green eyes seem bigger than ever. He thought about the times he’d tried it on with her at college; he couldn’t do that now, it would feel wrong, it would feel weird. But he felt a kinship between them, a connection, a closeness.
    ‘Poor Nat,’ he said, putting his arm around her shoulders.
    ‘What d’you mean, poor Nat?’
    ‘You and me, sweetheart… Oh, it’s nothing. It’s nothing.’ He leaned down and gave her a kiss on the cheek, squeezing her closer, and at that moment Andrew turned to look at them and something passed across his face, quick, fleeting, a shadow. Anger. Dan smiled at him, quizzically, asking a question, wordless, but he didn’t have time to get an answer, because there was a crash from inside. Andrew rolled his eyes.
    ‘That’ll be Lilah, smashing the crockery,’ he muttered.
    It wasn’t, though. It was Jen. Andrew and Conor went into the house to see