The View from Castle Rock

turned and addressed Andrew.
    “So there you are my lad and you have looked over at America,” he said. “God grant you one day you will see it closer up and for yourself.”

***

    Andrew has been to the Castle one time since, with a group of the lads from Ettrick, who all wanted to see the great cannon, Mons Meg. But nothing seemed to be in the same place then and he could not find the route they had taken to climb up to the rock. He saw a couple of places blocked off with boards that could have been it. But he did not even try to peer through them-he had no wish to tell the others what he was looking for. Even when he was ten years old he had known that the men with his father were drunk. If he did not understand that his father was drunk-due to his father’s sure-footedness and sense of purpose, his commanding behavior-he did certainly understand that something was not as it should be. He knew he was not looking at America, though it was some years before he was well enough acquainted with maps to know that he had been looking at Fife.
    Still, he did not know if those men met in the tavern had been mocking his father, or if it was his father playing one of his tricks on them.

    Old James the father. Andrew. Walter. Their sister Mary. Andrew’s wife Agnes, and Agnes and Andrew’s son James, under two years old.
    In the harbor of Leith, on the 4th of June, 1818, they set foot on board a ship for the first time in their lives.
    Old James makes this fact known to the ship’s officer who is checking off the names.
    “The first time, serra, in all my long life. We are men of the Ettrick. It is a landlocked part of the world.”
    The officer says a word which is unintelligible to them but plain in meaning. Move along. He has run a line through their names. They move along or are pushed along, Young James riding on Mary’s hip.
    “What is this?” says Old James, regarding the crowd of people on deck. “Where are we to sleep? Where have all these rabble come from? Look at the faces on them, are they the blackamoors?”
    “Black Highlanders, more like,” says his son Walter. This is a joke, muttered so his father cannot hear-Highlanders being one of the sorts the old man despises.
    “There are too many people,” his father continues. “The ship will sink.”
    “No,” says Walter, speaking up now. “Ships do not often sink because of too many people. That’s what the fellow was there for, to count the people.”
    Barely on board the vessel and this seventeen-year-old whelp has taken on knowing airs, he has taken to contradicting his father. Fatigue, astonishment, and the weight of the greatcoat he is wearing prevent Old James from cuffing him.
    All the business of life aboard ship has already been explained to the family. In fact it has been explained by the old man himself. He was the one who knew all about provisions, accommodations, and the kind of people you would find on board. All Scotsmen and all decent folk. No Highlanders, no Irish.
    But now he cries out that it is like the swarm of bees in the carcass of the lion.
    “An evil lot, an evil lot. Oh, that ever we left our native land!”
    “We have not left yet,” says Andrew. “We are still looking at Leith. We would do best to go below and find ourselves a place.”

    More lamentation. The bunks are narrow, bare planks with horsehair pallets both hard and prickly.
    “Better than nothing,” says Andrew.
    “Oh, that it was ever put in my head to bring us here, onto this floating sepulchre.”
    Will nobody shut him up? thinks Agnes. This is the way he will go on and on, like a preacher or a lunatic, when the fit takes him. She cannot abide it. She is in more agony herself than he is ever likely to know.
    “Well, are we going to settle here or are we not?” she says.
    Some people have hung up their plaids or shawls to make a half-private space for their families. She goes ahead and takes off her outer wrappings to do the same.
    The child is turning somersaults in her belly. Her face is hot as a coal and her legs throb and the swollen flesh in between them-the lips the child must soon part to get out-is a scalding sack of pain. Her mother would have known what to do about that, she would have known which leaves to mash to make a soothing poultice.
    At the thought of her mother such misery overcomes her that she wants to kick somebody.
    Andrew folds up his plaid to make a comfortable seat for his father. The old man seats himself, groaning,