Wuthering Heights

only love her from the waist down.”
    ‘Isabella leapt to her
feet, letting another partially stretched haddock fall to the floor. “He’s a
monster, Nelly, he treasures his pile ointment more than me. His real love is
Cathy. Just mention her name and he gets a swelling.”
    ‘ “That’s enough,” shouted
Heathcliff. Great waves of garlic, curry and karachi wafted from him. Grabbing
Isabella he shook her till her teeth rattled, her shoes fell off and her
knickers came down. “Upstairs with you, prepare to continue the honeymoon.”
    ‘ “Do you know what pity means?” I said, hastening to resume my bonnet.
    ‘ “Stop,” he said. “Do not
resume that bonnet!”
    ‘ “Please stay out of
curry-smelling distance,” I said. ‘ “So, Nelly,” he said from another room. “I
am determined to see Catherine again.”
    ‘At the mention of her name
I noticed the swelling in his trousers. Using money, he forced me to take a
note to Cathy and a freshly stretched haddock. Notwithstanding my journey
hither was sadder than my journey thither. On my way thither I was happy but
coming hither I was sad. I tried to avoid hither and arrived back via thither.’

Chapter
XIV
    -------------
     
     
     
    HAD MADE UP my mind not to give Cathy
Heathcliff’s letter until Mr Linton was somewhere else, like China. This day
Cathy, in a pure white dress save a few gravy stains, was seated in a chair at
the window; her long thick hair which had been partly removed during her illness
was now back from the cleaners and hung in tresses down her back, her haggard
aspect had gone; she had a peculiar expression arising from her mental state.
She gave chicken clucks and an occasional quack quack. It stamped her as one
doomed to decay — already bits were falling off her. A book lay spread before
her, she had been eating it. It had been placed there with loving hand by
Edgar. Gimmerton chapel bells were still ringing, their sound came soothingly
to the ear, sometimes it reached the teeth and up the nose.
    ‘ “There’s a letter for
you, Cathy, shall I open it?”
    ‘ “Yes,” she answered.
    ‘Taking a hammer I smashed
the seal to pieces. I opened it. “It’s very short,” I said.
    ‘ “Is it from a dwarf?” she
said. As she read the letter her face came alive with passion and an attack of
the hiccups. “Where is he — hie?,” she said.
    ‘ “He’s outside by the
tree,” I said.
    ‘As she spoke I observed a
large dog lying on the sunny grass. He raised his ears and started to bark when
he got a kick up the arse from Heathcliff.
    ‘ “What — hic — was that?”
asked Cathy.
    ‘ “It was Heathcliff
kicking a dog up the arse,” I said.
    ‘ “Ooh, how lovely,” she
said, hicking and clapping her hands together. Cathy listened and gazed towards
the entrance of her chamber.
    ‘He did not hit the right
room directly, but walked by mistake into the toilet shouting, “Darling.”
Finally he came in; in a stride or two he was at her side and had grasped her
in his arms, and before I could stop them they’d had a couple of quickies. He
neither spoke nor loosened his hold for five minutes. He rained burning hot
kisses, and steam started to issue from Cathy’s clothes; her shoes melted.
    ‘ “Oh Cathy! O my life! I
can’t bear it.” It was the first sentence he uttered in a strained voice, due
to the pressure in his trousers, and before I could stop them they had another
couple of quickies.
    ‘ “Not so fast,” gasped
Cathy. “Pretend it’s timeshare.”
    ‘I threw a bucket of water
over them but it was no use.
    ‘ “What now,” said Cathy.
“Oh, Heathcliff. You”, she said, “and Edgar have broken my heart.”
    ‘ “Oh, I am sorry,” said
Heathcliff.
    ‘ “You have killed me,” she
said.
    ‘ “Oh?” said Heathcliff.
“Are you dead?”
    ‘ “How many years do you
mean to live after I am gone?” she said.
    ‘ “About sixty, if it’s all
right with you.” Heathcliff knelt on one knee to embrace her. He attempted to
rise, but she seized his hair and kept him down. “I wish I could hold you till
we were both dead.”
    ‘ “Well, you go first,”
said Heathcliff.
    ‘ “Tell me, Heathcliff,”
she said, shaking her head, “why shouldn’t you suffer? I do.”
    ‘ “I do suffer, Cathy, I
have piles,” he said. “Don’t torture me, Cathy, till I’m as mad as yourself.”
So saying, he wrenched his head free. A tuft of hair came away in her hand,
leaving him with a bald