Baby Be Mine

‘He really was wasted, wasn’t he?’
    ‘That was nothing. You should have seen him when we went on tour.’
    She sighs and looks at me sadly.
    ‘What are you thinking?’ I ask after a while because the curiosity is killing me, even though I’m no longer a cat.
    ‘He really is a shit, isn’t he?’
    ‘Yep,’ I reply, deflated.
    ‘You know, I kind of thought . . . I don’t know.’
    ‘What?’ I press.
    ‘I thought there might have been a happy ending in it for you two—’
    ‘Fat chance,’ I interrupt angrily. Then I’m the one who’s sighing. ‘I don’t know what I’m doing here, Bess.’ She keeps staring at me sadly. ‘I don’t know what I’m doing with my life. What have I achieved? Nothing. I’m nothing.’
    ‘That’s not true,’ she butts in, nodding pointedly at Barney. ‘You’ve achieved more than me.’
    I shake my head, hopelessly.
    ‘How was last night?’ she asks, changing the subject.
    ‘Good,’ I reply, and can’t help smirking.
    ‘Was he?’ she asks with a cheeky grin.
    ‘Was he what?’
    ‘Good?’
    I giggle. ‘Just a bit.’
    ‘Are you going to see him again?’
    ‘I hope so!’
    We doze off again after breakfast, but after a while I get up and get ready. I ask Bess to stay with Barney in my room while I go downstairs into the unknown. I wouldn’t like to say it’s worse than I imagined – because what I imagined was pretty damn horrendous – but it certainly comes close. It reeks of alcohol, smoke and vomit. I can see from my view up here on the landing that there’s broken glass in at least three different places, and I dread to think of the cocaine dust on the coffee table and God know what – and where – else. I can’t see any people so hopefully they’ve all gone home, although I haven’t been outside yet. And right now, I don’t intend to.
    I return to my room and call Sandy, Johnny’s maid. She says she’ll organise a team of professional cleaners.
    ‘They’ve been here before; they know what they’re doing,’ she reveals.
    ‘Have they been here before?’ I ask. Johnny never had house parties like this when I worked for him.
    ‘Three times since March,’ she says pointedly.
    That was when Johnny met Dana. Another non-fan of the girlfriend . . .
    The cleaners arrive within the hour. We stay upstairs and out of sight, but my anger has been steadily brewing since last night – and especially since Sandy’s revelation. I’m trying to keep a lid on it, but finally I can stand it no longer.
    ‘Are you alright here?’ I ask Bess, who’s watching a DVD with Barney on the flatscreen in my bedroom.
    ‘Where are you going?’ she asks.
    ‘I have to speak to him.’
    She nods, her face serious. ‘Take your time.’
    I go to his bedroom door and knock loudly. No answer, as I expected. I pound harder and harder, until eventually I give up and try the door. It’s not locked.
    The stench I smelled earlier – smoke, booze, vomit – has started to evaporate from the rest of the house, thanks to the cleaners and fresh air, but now it oozes out of the room. Dread replaces some of the anger as I suddenly wonder what I might find inside. I take each step with trepidation until I round the corner and the bed comes into view. Dana is lying naked on her back and sprawled across the bed diagonally. There’s a pool of vomit on the floor beside her, but she is breathing. I feel sickened at the sight; but as for Johnny, he’s nowhere to be seen. I try the en-suite door – it’s locked. I pound on the door and call his name, but there’s no answer.
    ‘What the fuck?’ Dana calls groggily from the bed.
    ‘Is Johnny in the bathroom?’ I shout at her. She shrugs and collapses backwards, not even bothering to cover up her skinny frame.
    I slam my hand on the door in frustration and then look at the lock. He may be a millionaire, but he’s still only got one of those locks that can be opened quite easily from this side, with a coin.
    ‘Have you got any coins?’ I demand to know from Dana.
    ‘What?’ she asks. She’s totally out of it.
    ‘Damn you!’ I erupt. I run from the room to my bedroom and burst inside.
    ‘What? What is it?’ Bess asks fearfully.
    ‘Money, I need money,’ I say in a tizz. I grab my bag and get out a coin. ‘Stay here,’ I tell her, running out again.
    Dana appears to have fallen back into unconsciousness so I unlock the door, full of nausea and fear. Is this how Rosa felt? My heart jumps as I see him lying