Days of Love and Blood

the girls and Ben talk about the past. I heard Ronan playing with the boys on the other side of our wraparound porch. I wanted to be alone with him. He heard the fight. He knew Cooper left. He looked as heartbroken as he was confused but the boys took his attention away quickly.
    Marianna took the lea d over the conversation. If the talk wandered into serious terrain, she would burst out laughing and tell a funny story about her old life in the dental office where she had worked or about her children, and urge everyone to do the same. I knew it was for my benefit yet she allowed me to stay quiet in the corner without attempting to bring me into the conversation. I smiled every so often and laughed when I needed to.
    I rolled my head to the side when I heard Cooper’s truck pull up.
    “Oh my God,” Ivy breathed.
    Cooper got out of the truck and went to the back without looking up at us and hauled out his tent. He carried it to the center of the side lawn next to the aluminum chiminea and had it fully erected in less than two minutes.
    “He just put up a tent, Carson,” said Ivy.
    “I have eyes.”
    “What the hell is he doing?” asked Gretchen.
    “Being stubborn,” I replied.
    “Are you going to go talk to him?” asked Ivy.
    “Nope.” I said after a lengthy pause. “No, I am not.”
    “Should I leave?” asked Ben.
    “No, Ben. You don’t have to.”
    “I’m so sorry. I feel like I caused all of this.”
    “You didn’t, Ben,” I assured him. Cooper brought this on all on his own, although I hated to admit it. I thought of Cooper’s warm lips against my shoulder and I shivered.
    “When we leave, Ben, you can come along with us,” said Marianna. “But not yet.”
    “Will you be okay alone, Carson?” Ben asked.
    “I’ll be fine. Especially if Cooper is parked outside in his tent. Then I’ll be more than fine.” I suddenly laughed at my own odd sense of humor. “Can you imagine what would happen if a homicidal ran into Cooper while he’s in that mood?” No one else laughed.
    “Do you want to talk about it?” asked Gretchen. Ben leaned forward and tilted his head at me.
    “I don’t really understand it,” I admitted. “He’s mad that I didn’t agree with him back at Ivy’s house, when we took the vote. And now he’s mad that Ben’s here. He’s mad every other day. I know what bothers him when he’s upset, but it’s hard to calm him down.”
    “But what he said,” Ivy said in a questioning manner.
    “He apologized for it.”
    “There’s no excuse,” said Gretchen. Marianna sucked in a quick breath and gave Gretchen a disapproving nod.
    “I know,” I said. “But that’s who he is. Impulsive. Irrational. Arrogant. But there are those times, most of the time, when he’s not like that. When he’s with me. When he’s with Ronan. Still, that’s not even the point. I honestly can’t believe he wanted to take a hunting party to kill two survivors.”
    “Me either,” concurred Ben.
    “You weren’t there,” I protested, in complete contradiction to myself. “These guys were awful. They way they acted; they might as well have been homicidals. But the fact is, they weren’t. I can see his point, though. These men wanted to have their way me and Tasha, and they didn’t hide their intentions. Not at all. They looked crazy, wearing army camo. Cooper was being protective. I think he’s mad because he feels like he can’t protect me when he wants to. His hands were tied at the vote and he’s fighting to get the knots out.” I thought about the son he couldn’t save. “He feels helpless.”
    “I’m sure they seemed menacing but you can’t punish someone for looking scary. If we sentenced people for no reason, our society would fall apart. We can’t automatically condemn people who haven’t committed any crimes. If we did, we might as well go back to the dark ages - maybe have a few witch hunts and things like that.”
    “Ben used to be a lawyer,” I explained. “He feels strongly about this stuff. But so do I. I don’t believe in the death penalty.”
    “You don’t?” asked Ivy.
    “Nope. Never have and I probably never will. I know what you’re thinking.”
    “I wasn’t going to say anything,” she said while holding up her hands.
    “What?” asked Ben.
    “ Ivy thinks that my staunch aversion to the death penalty is strange for someone who kills homicidals without breaking a sweat. I have no problem with killing them because they’re not human.