Escaping Reality

into you, but please
    don’t.”
    His voice is gruff, affected, vulnerable in a way I didn’t know him
    capable of being. And his eyes, those deep blue, amazing eyes are blurred
    with shadows and torment over me, over something in his past I am not
    sure I understand. All I know is he’s letting me see it, and him, and he is
    exactly what he preaches. Raw and honest, and intense, and I believe in this
    moment we are a rainbow of the same colors, none of them bright or
    beautiful. We are the many shades of gray and black, hoping to find a
    glimmer of light in each other, not more darkness.
    I press my hand to his cheek and he leans into my touch. “I don’t
    want to go anywhere,” I whisper, and I don’t want him to go anywhere
    either, but deep down I know he will or I will. We are destined to end. This
    is the way of my world and he is as captive to it as I am without knowing it.
    “Then I’m not going to let you,” he says, his hand sliding into my hair,
    his mouth closing down on mine, and there is more than passion that
    bleeds into my mouth. There is the promise he means to hold onto me, and
    I pray it’s not one we will both regret.

    ***
    Liam and I are about to walk into the cell phone store when Liam’s
    phone rings. “It’s
    Derek. I’ll meet you inside.” Relief washes over me. He won’t see my
    Colorado license.
    Liam holds the door for me and I step into the store and hear him
    say, “No, I am not going to meet with him today,” followed by a deliciously
    deep, sexy laugh I could seriously get drunk on.
    I find Scott behind the counter on the phone and he waves me
    forward. Eager to take advantage of Liam’s absence and wondering how
    long I can really keep secrets from him, I rush forward. Rushing does me no
    good. The customer Scott is talking to is difficult, and I find myself twisting
    my fingers in knots, trying to will the call the end. My gaze falls on a typed
    note about some cell phone accessories and my mind goes to the typed
    note left on my door. I can picture it.
    I w as in your neighborhood and Dermit wanted me to check on you
    and drop this by.
    Looks like I missed you. Call the office if you need anything. Luke
    Evernight.
    I straighten and stiffen. The note was typed, but it sounded like he’d
    handwritten it when I didn’t answer the door. That isn’t logical. Why didn’t
    he handwrite it? Surely he didn’t go back to his office to type it. And why
    would he type a note stating I wasn’t home before discovering that to be
    the case?
    Scott hangs up and slides my ID to me. “Here you go, Ms. Bensen.
    Nice and safe.”
    I shake off enough of the unease to focus on the present. “Thank
    you. I’m so glad you kept calling. I thought it was a wrong number.”
    He frowns. “I only called the one time and got lucky you answered.”
    “One time?”
    He nods.
    “Oh.” My throat thickens. Someone else had called me. “I received
    another ‘unknown’ call. Can you look up who it came from?”
    “Unknown or blocked?”
    I grab my phone and look. “Oh,” I say again. “Blocked. I guess I
    thought they were the same. Yours was blocked, too.”
    “No, blocked means you intentionally make sure the person can’t
    find your contact info. I called from my cell so I blocked the call.”
    “But no one but you has my number.” And Meg, but not before the
    first call in question.
    “It’s probably overflow from whoever had the number before you.”
    “Okay. Thank you for everything.” I sound robotic. I don’t feel it. I feel
    more like a wheel spinning out of control. Liam’s right. Something is off
    about what is happening around me. I pull up the internet on my phone
    and go into Gmail, watching the door for Liam, and checking my new inbox.
    Nothing. No messages from my “boss”, or anyone for that matter.
    Suddenly, that apartment I will never call mine by choice feels creepy. I’m
    all for going to Liam’s safe hotel. I’ll figure out what to do next when Liam
    goes to his meetings tomorrow.
    I reach the exit and Liam holds the door for me, ending a call as he
    does, and just seeing him brings down my nerves a notch. We start walking
    toward both the hotel and my apartment.
    “I found an acupuncturist to come to the hotel this afternoon and do
    a treatment,” he informs me.
    “I didn’t even know they would work on Sundays, let alone do house
    calls.”
    He winks. “I can be persuasive.”
    “You have to stop spending money on me.”
    “Stop