Existence 01 - Existence

tilted my chin up so I wouldn’t have a choice. “You’re embarrassed.” I averted my eyes and he chuckled. “That’s cute.”
    Ugh! We were back to me being cute. I glanced back at him. “Please stop saying I’m cute. It’s kind of insulting.”
    He frowned as he dropped his hand from my chin. “How is that insulting?”
    I shrugged, not wanting to talk about it and wishing I’d kept my mouth shut. “It just is. No one wants to be cute. Puppies are cute.” I reached for his notebook and kept my eyes on the paper and read over the topic, or at least attempted to act like I was reading over it.
    “Well, you definitely don’t look like a puppy,” he said with a chuckle.
    “Well, that’s something at least.” We needed to change the subject and I needed to learn to curb my tongue.
    “Okay, so what are the three main reasons you believe safe sex is important?” Maybe now we could get off the topic of me and my cuteness. He didn’t answer and I glanced up at him. He was watching me with a serious expression.
    “Are you not sure?”
    He didn’t reply.
    “Um, okay what about teenage pregnancy? That’s a good point. No one needs to become a parent while they’re still a kid.”
    Again, he didn’t respond, so I wrote it down.
    “Your feelings are hurt,” he said quietly. I froze but kept my eyes on the paper. “I didn’t mean to say something to hurt your feelings,” he continued.
    I wanted to deny it but I figured accepting his apology and moving on would be the best way to handle this. “It’s fine. Let’s get working on your essay.”
    He stared down at the paper. “Teenage pregnancy is definitely one reason,” he agreed.
    “Okay, so what about STD’s?” I suggested, writing it down as I spoke.
    “That’s another good one.”
    I started to write it down but he reached over and took the notebook from me. Startled, I jerked my head up to see what he was doing. He gave me an apologetic smile. “Sorry, but I couldn’t think of any other way to get your attention.”
    Not sure how to respond, I sat silently and waited on him to finish.
    “You aren’t just cute. Yes, you make cute faces and do cute things but you aren’t just cute.” Hearing him explain himself made me feel silly for even saying anything about it.
    “Okay,” I managed to mumble.
    He slid the notebook back to me. “Now, let’s see...what about the fact that using a condom takes away from the pleasure, should we discuss that?”
    I choked on my soda and started coughing uncontrollably while Leif patted me on the back. Once I got myself under control, I glanced up and caught him biting back a smile.
    “Again, you do a lot of cute things, but you aren’t just cute.”

Chapter Four
    Leif didn’t show up last night to finish his speech and it was due today. Not showing up wasn’t like him. The later it got without a call from him the angrier I’d become. In the end, I finished the speech myself and printed it out. Deep down I believed he would have a good excuse and letting him make a bad grade had seemed cruel. I reached into my bag to pull out his speech as I made my way down the hall. I just hoped when I found him and handed him this paper he would have a legitimate excuse for last night. Admitting to myself that I needed him to have a really good excuse hadn’t been easy. I’d let myself care about Leif Montgomery way too much.
    “Hey girly, what’s up? I miss you.” Miranda slipped her arm around my waist and laid her head on my shoulder. I missed her too. Last year when she and Wyatt had been dating I’d been with Jay. It hadn’t made me feel isolated from my friends when they’d become an item. With me being single and the other two in my trio being a couple, I couldn’t help but feel like the third wheel.
    “I miss you too. We need to go out together one night. Maybe a girls’ night out,” I suggested while searching through the crowd of students clogging up the hallway for Leif.
    “That sounds wonderful! Let’s plan on doing it one night this weekend.” She paused and frowned. “Or maybe next weekend.” The uncharacteristic frown was proof enough she hated telling me she was busy.
    I shrugged and forced a smile. “No worries. Whenever you have time.” I glanced back down the hall and this time managed to get a glimpse of Leif at his locker. His back faced the crowded hallway. I turned back to Miranda. “I need to get this to Leif. I’ll catch up with you at lunch.”
    The crowd