Forget Me Never

trying to be invisible, but he’d already seen me.
    ‘Oh, hi, Sophie,’ he said. ‘Didn’t know you were here. Wow, you look amazing!’
    Had I just imagined that? No, he had genuinely complimented me. He was smiling too, showing perfect teeth. I wasn’t sure what to say, so I took a quick glug of my drink.
    Finn finished his cigarette and threw it on the ground, stubbing it out with his shoe. He came over, still smiling, hands in pockets, the height of casual cool. ‘You know . . . I never noticed how pretty you are before. You kind of slip under the radar at school.’
    ‘Maybe I like it that way,’ I said. To my surprise, Finn started talking about the party. I couldn’t believe he was interested in spending time with me. It had occurred to me that I might attract some attention dressed like this, but I hadn’t seriously expected it, and not from anyone like Finn.
    ‘You’re way friendlier tonight than you ever are at school,’ Finn said. ‘To be honest, I always thought you were really moody.’
    ‘I don’t try to be,’ I said, reaching up to brush my fringe from my eyes.
    ‘Then why are you? If you don’t mind me asking.’
    Normally I’d never answer that question. I didn’t feel comfortable talking about my life to anyone, let alone a virtual stranger. But Finn was being nice to me, and the mojito was making me feel less uptight.
    ‘Life is sometimes a bit crap,’ I said, not meeting his eyes. ‘I feel sad and angry a lot of the time, and sometimes I don’t even know why. That makes it tough to be around people – and for people to be around me. And those I do feel I can be with always seem to leave me. My cousin . . .’ For a second I felt a lump in my throat. ‘Well, she understood me. And now she’s dead. Sometimes I look at what I have and it seems there’s nothing good.’
    Finn looked as though he didn’t know what to say. ‘I’m sorry. That’s harsh.’
    ‘I don’t have anyone left now,’ I said. Afraid I was going to embarrass myself by crying, I dabbed at my eye – and heard a giggle. To my horror I saw that we weren’t alone. Zoe and her friends were coming up, holding their phones and laughing.
    ‘Were you filming that?’ I demanded, though I already knew the answer. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Finn disappearing into the house.
    ‘An Oscar-worthy performance – so moving! I was having trouble holding my phone straight I was shaking so much.’ Zoe paused. ‘Poor little Sophie, such a tragic life, no one to confide in, so much pain! No wonder you dress like a tramp!’
    My legs were shaking and for a moment I thought they’d buckle. It felt as if I was about to fall to pieces – and then all my emotions turned into burning anger. I had never done anything to Zoe! How dare she pick on me, make my life more hellish, when it was bad enough already?
    I realized I was holding the remains of my drink. I hurled it at Zoe. It splashed across her top, and she screamed. Taking advantage of her surprise, I plunged forward and grabbed her phone. It was a swish new pink iPhone, and that was all I took in before I threw it across the garden. It slammed into the wall and clattered to the ground. Amazingly, it still seemed to be in one piece. I reached it before Zoe could and brought my heel down, hard.
    ‘Screw your video and screw you, Zoe!’ I shouted, shoving her away from me. What I might have done next I don’t know – because that’s when I realized that one of Zoe’s bitchy friends was still filming me. Horrified, I ran into the house and out through the front door. No one noticed me – they were having too much of a good time. I took off my shoes and made for home, tears streaming down my face.
    On Monday at school I found out that the video of me smashing Zoe’s phone had been uploaded on to YouTube. It was all across Facebook too – cleverly edited so it looked as if I was randomly lashing out. What had gone before I’d flipped, with me confessing to Finn how crap I felt, had been cut. Everywhere I went, people seemed to be laughing and even reciting some of the stuff I’d said. I wanted to fade away. It was useless trying to explain why I’d gone for Zoe. Who was going to listen – let alone understand? And I’d thought my life couldn’t get any worse.
    Not everyone was horrible – Paloma and her friends were outraged, and a couple of others came up to me and said Zoe deserved it. Many people simply didn’t care. Finn actually