Howards End

possible, in the hope that her brain would cry, "Rubbish, you’re a self–conscious fool!" But her brain only tingled a little and was silent, and for a time she sat gazing at the mincing waves, and wondering whether the news would seem strange to the others.
    As soon as she began speaking, the sound of her own voice reassured her. There could be nothing in it. The replies also were typical, and in the burr of conversation her fears vanished.
    "You needn’t go though—" began her hostess.
    "I needn’t, but hadn’t I better? It’s really getting rather serious. We let chance after chance slip, and the end of it is we shall be bundled out bag and baggage into the street. We don’t know what we WANT, that’s the mischief with us—"
    "No, we have no real ties," said Helen, helping herself to toast.
    "Shan’t I go up to town to–day, take the house if it’s the least possible, and then come down by the afternoon train to–morrow, and start enjoying myself. I shall be no fun to myself or to others until this business is off my mind."
    "But you won’t do anything rash, Margaret?"
    "There’s nothing rash to do."
    "Who ARE the Wilcoxes?" said Tibby, a question that sounds silly, but was really extremely subtle as his aunt found to her cost when she tried to answer it. "I don’t MANAGE the Wilcoxes; I don’t see where they come IN."
    "No more do I," agreed Helen. "It’s funny that we just don’t lose sight of them. Out of all our hotel acquaintances, Mr. Wilcox is the only one who has stuck. It is now over three years, and we have drifted away from far more interesting people in that time."
    "Interesting people don’t get one houses."
    "Meg, if you start in your honest–English vein, I shall throw the treacle at you."
    "It’s a better vein than the cosmopolitan," said Margaret, getting up. "Now, children, which is it to be? You know the Ducie Street house. Shall I say yes or shall I say no? Tibby love—which? I’m specially anxious to pin you both."
    "It all depends on what meaning you attach to the word 'possible'"
    "It depends on nothing of the sort. Say 'yes.'"
    "Say 'no.'"
    Then Margaret spoke rather seriously. "I think," she said, "that our race is degenerating. We cannot settle even this little thing; what will it be like when we have to settle a big one?"
    "It will be as easy as eating," returned Helen.
    "I was thinking of father. How could he settle to leave Germany as he did, when he had fought for it as a young man, and all his feelings and friends were Prussian? How could he break loose with Patriotism and begin aiming at something else? It would have killed me. When he was nearly forty he could change countries and ideals—and we, at our age, can’t change houses. It’s humiliating."
    "Your father may have been able to change countries," said Mrs. Munt with asperity, "and that may or may not be a good thing. But he could change houses no better than you can, in fact, much worse. Never shall I forget what poor Emily suffered in the move from Manchester."
    "I knew it," cried Helen. "I told you so. It is the little things one bungles at. The big, real ones are nothing when they come."
    "Bungle, my dear! You are too little to recollect—in fact, you weren’t there. But the furniture was actually in the vans and on the move before the lease for Wickham Place was signed, and Emily took train with baby—who was Margaret then—and the smaller luggage for London, without so much as knowing where her new home would be. Getting away from that house may be hard, but it is nothing to the misery that we all went through getting you into it."
    Helen, with her mouth full, cried:
    "And that’s the man who beat the Austrians, and the Danes, and the French, and who beat the Germans that were inside himself. And we’re like him."
    "Speak for yourself," said Tibby. "Remember that I am cosmopolitan, please."
    "Helen may be right."
    "Of course she’s right," said Helen.
    Helen might be right, but she did not go up to London. Margaret did that. An interrupted holiday is the worst of the minor worries, and one may be pardoned for feeling morbid when a business letter snatches one away from the sea and friends. She could not believe that her father had ever felt the same. Her eyes had been troubling her lately, so that she could not read in the train and it bored her to look at the landscape, which she had seen but yesterday. At Southampton she "waved" to Frieda; Frieda was on her way down to join them