Kinder des Schicksals 4 (Xeelee 9): Resplendent

blast us out of the sky?
    I caught the eye of First Officer Till. He was a veteran of twenty
years; his scalp had been burned away in some ancient close-run
combat, long before I was born, and he wore a crown of scar tissue
with pride. ’Let’s do it, tar,’ he growled.
    All the fear went away. I was overwhelmed by a feeling of
togetherness, of us all being in this crap together. I had no thought
of dying. Just: let’s get through this. ’Yes, sir!’
    Pael finished his countdown.
    All the lights went out. Detonating stars wheeled.
    And the ship exploded.
     
    I was thrown into darkness. Air howled. Emergency bulkheads
scythed past me, and I could hear people scream.
    I slammed into the curving hull, nose pressed against the
stars.
    I bounced off and drifted. The inertial suspension was out, then.
I thought I could smell blood - probably my own.
    I could see the Ghost ship, a tangle of rope and silver baubles,
glinting with highlights from the fortress star. We were still
closing. We were going to collide in minutes, no more.
    But I could also see shards of shattered lifedome, a sputtering
drive unit. The shards were bits of the Brightly. It had gone, all
gone, in a fraction of a second.
    ’Let’s do it,’ I murmured.
    Maybe I was out of it for a while.
    Somebody grabbed my ankle and tugged me down. There was a
competent slap on my cheek, enough to make me focus.
    ’Case. Can you hear me?’
    It was First Officer Till. Even in the swimming starlight that
burned-off scalp was unmistakable.
    I glanced around. There were four of us here: Till, Commissary
Jeru, Academician Pael, me. We were huddled up against what looked
like the stump of the First Officer’s console. I realised that the
gale of venting air had stopped. I was back inside a hull with
integrity, then -
    ’Case!’
    ’I - yes, sir.’
    ’Report.’
    I touched my lip; my hand came away bloody. At a time like that
it’s your duty to report your injuries, honestly and fully. Nobody
needs a hero who turns out not to be able to function. ’I think I’m
all right. I may have concussion.’
    ’Good enough. Strap down.’ Till handed me a length of rope.
    I saw that the others had tied themselves to struts. I did the
same.
    Till, with practised ease, swam away into the air, I guessed
looking for other survivors.
    Academician Pael was trying to curl into a ball. He couldn’t even
speak. The tears just rolled out of his eyes. I stared at the way big
globules welled up and drifted away into the air, glimmering. The
action had been over in seconds. That was war in space for you,
journeys that can last years, combat that’s over in heartbeats, and
your story is done. All a bit sudden for an earthworm, I guess.
    Nearby, I saw, trapped under one of the emergency bulkheads, there
was a pair of legs - just that. The rest of the body must have been
chopped away, gone drifting off with the rest of the debris from
Brightly. But I recognised those legs, from a garish pink stripe on
the sole of the right boot. That had been Halle. She was the only
girl I had ever screwed - and more than likely, given the situation,
the only girl I ever would get to screw. I couldn’t figure out how I
felt about that.
    Jeru was watching Pael, and me. ’Tar - do you think we should all
be frightened for ourselves, like the Academician?’ Her accent was
strong, unidentifiable.
    ’No, sir.’
    ’No.’ Jeru studied Pael with contempt. ’We are in an escape yacht,
Academician. A bit of the lifedome, carved out by the emergency
bulkheads when the Brightly was attacked.’ She sniffed. ’We have air,
and it isn’t foul yet. But we’re still closing on that Ghost
cruiser.’
    I’d managed to forget where we were going, and how little time we
had. Fear pricked.
    Jeru winked at me. ’Maybe we can do a little damage to the Ghosts
before we die, tar. What do you think?’
    I grinned. ’Yes, sir.’
    Pael lifted his head and stared at me with salt water eyes.
’Lethe. You people are monsters.’ His accent was gentle, a lilt.
’Even a child such as this. You embrace death - ’
    Jeru grabbed Pael’s jaw in a massive hand, and pinched the joints
until he squealed. ’Captain Teid grabbed you, Academician; she threw
you here, to safety, before the bulkhead came down. I saw it. If she
hadn’t taken the time to do that, she would have made it herself. Was
she a monster? Did she embrace death?’ And she pushed Pael’s face
away.
    For some reason I hadn’t thought about the