Never a Hero

yellow, reminding me of iridescent candy corn. Some of the trees still had leaves. Others were bare. Glowing ghosts swayed in the branches. Up and down the sidewalk, at least a dozen different inflatable decorations stood guard in front of businesses. Packs of children ran laughing, bags held tight in their hands. Parents strolled behind, checking their watches, waving to one another.
    “It’s beautiful,” I said.
    “Yeah, it is a nice night,” Nick said, clearly missing my point. “I’m glad we have good weather for once. Seems like Halloween in Colorado is cold more often than not, and it’s never fun to have to put a coat on over your costume.”
    “Did you grow up here?”
    “In Grand Junction. How about you?”
    “Laramie. Halloweens there were always windy as hell.”
    “I thought every day in Wyoming was windy as hell.”
    “Good point.”
    I followed him through the plaza, gazing around like an awestruck kid. I was amazed, not just at the lights, but at the entire atmosphere of the place. There was so much laughter. The district felt festive and cozy at the same time. I began to notice how many same-sex couples there were holding hands. How many children were escorted by two moms or two dads. The ice cream shop was practically bubbling with energy and laughter. Kids giggled over cups of ice cream crawling with candy worms.
    I moved closer to Nick, and he put his arm over my shoulders. I heard Paul’s voice in my head. So you are his boyfriend! At that moment, it almost felt true, but I didn’t dare assume anything.
    “Here,” Nick said, stopping in front of a door that said Ink Springs. “Come in and meet Seth.”
    The bell on the door jingled as it closed behind us and Nick pulled his arm away from me. A bearded man with more ink than skin scowled at us, and I felt Nick go stiff beside me. “Seth here?”
    He didn’t get much more than a grunt in return, but the man ducked into the back, and a second later, Seth appeared. “This is a nice surprise,” he said to Nick. “You here to do more work on that shoulder?”
    “No. I wanted to introduce you to Owen. He lives above me.”
    Seth turned an appraising eye my way, looking me up and down without embarrassment. I began to blush when his gaze reached my arm, but Nick said, “He’s trying to figure out if you have any ink.”
    Seth laughed. “He knows me too well. Always trying to scope out people’s art.”
    “No tattoos,” I said.
    Seth’s smile grew exponentially. “Nice going, Nick! You brought me a blank canvas to work on.” He looked again at my arm. “Good skin, too. Not much hair to worry about.” He took a binder off the counter and handed it to me. “Pick something. My chair’s empty tonight. I’ll give you the Virgin Discount.”
    For half a second, I wondered how he knew I was a virgin. Then I realized he wasn’t talking about my sexual status, but about my lack of tattoos.
    They were both watching me, expecting a reaction. The binder was big, so I put it on the countertop in order to avoid having to balance it on my stump while I looked, and opened it. The first page was full of snakes and scorpions. Nick laughed. “I don’t think those are your style.”
    “I don’t have a style.”
    “Not yet,” Seth said, rubbing his hands together with excitement. “That’s what’s so great about your first time. It’s like setting the mood, you know? Priming the wick. Popping your cherry.”
    I wondered if it was intentional that he kept using sexual references. I flipped to another page and found flowers and butterflies. Another page held tribal bands.
    “You’ve seen Nick’s ink, right?” Seth asked. “You could do something to match.” He winked at Nick. “That’d be cute, doing the couple thing. Matching hearts on your ass or something.”
    My cheeks began to burn. My hand shook as I turned the page. I didn’t dare look up.
    Nick laughed without embarrassment. He flipped the book closed and pushed it across the counter toward Seth. “Not tonight.”
    “Too bad.” Seth smiled at me. “The offer stands, though. Anytime.”
    “Thanks,” I said, although I had no intention of ever taking him up on it.
    Nick held the door for me. He didn’t seem to mind that everybody thought we were a couple. It made me feel reckless and brave, ready to reach out and take his hand, but then I remembered the way he’d pulled away. I was still thinking about it when he put his arm over my shoulder again, drawing