Never a Hero

His body was so tight and warm, and all I could think about was how good it would feel around my cock.
    I pulled my fingers out and tilted my erection toward him. It was awkward. I had to brace myself on my shortened left arm and hold my cock with my hand. I found his entrance, and he gasped when I pushed against him, but I knew the angle was all wrong.
    “Nick,” I started to say, but he was ahead of me. He reached back and helped me, guiding me into place. He pushed back and up with his hips. A bit of glorious pressure, and then I slid inside.
    It took my breath away. I pushed in farther, trying to go slow, but the pleasure of it was so new, so intense, so overwhelming, I found it difficult to hold back. I indulged in a few thrusts just to revel in how unbelievably good it felt. But then I reminded myself that this was supposed to be for him. Yes, it was my first time, and the urge to drive forward toward my own climax was strong, but I could do better by him than that.
    I bit back my own moan and concentrated instead on Nick. I loved the sounds he made and the way he writhed and moved. I thrilled at the way his hips arched up to meet me. It took me a couple more thrusts to find my balance and my rhythm, rocking back and forth against his ass, sliding in and out of him, but once I did, it was perfect.
    I leaned down to whisper into his ear. “Am I doing it right?”
    “Yes! Dear God, yes. Please don’t stop now.”
    “I don’t intend to.” Even as I said it, I pulled out slowly, almost all the way. He groaned in frustration, and I rocked into him again. “I won’t stop, but I’m not going to keep playing this game with you either. We’re happy together. We have fun together. We’re attracted to each other.” I thrust again, kissing his shoulder as I did. “We love each other.”
    “Yes.”
    One word, but it made my heart soar. “No more arguments. No more pushing me away.”
    “I’m scared, Owen. I’m so scared of hurting you.”
    “No more excuses, Nick.”
    “But—”
    “And no more talking.”
    He shuddered beneath me, whether from pleasure or from tears I didn’t know.
    I sat up again.
    And I fucked him.
    It was glorious, better than I’d ever imagined. I felt strong and alive and magnificent. I felt victorious. I watched the muscles ripple across his back as he writhed and panted beneath me. I listened to his labored breath, to his rapturous exclamations. I stroked his flesh and squeezed his ass, and through it all, I rocked in and out of him, slow at first, but building, moving faster as our passion grew until our flesh was slapping together, until his hands holding the headboard were taut fists, his knuckles white. Until he was trembling, calling my name, begging me for more.
    Until he came so hard he nearly screamed.
    His body tightened around my cock. The strength of it surprised me, and I waited until the spasms had stopped to pull out of him. I hadn’t come, but I didn’t mind. This had been for him, and if I had my way, we’d have plenty of time later. I pulled off the condom—clumsily, since it was my first time and I only had one hand, but I didn’t make too much of a mess—and tossed it in the trash. He lay beneath me, still shaking from the force of his orgasm, and I leaned down to kiss his shoulder.
    “Owen,” he whispered. He turned to take me in his arms, burying his face in my neck. He was shaking, and his cheeks were damp. “I still worry this is a bad idea.”
    “We’ve both done our time in the cage. I think it’s time we break free.”
    “I want you to be safe.”
    “To hell with safe. I want to be happy.” I kissed his cheek. “You make me happy.”
    He laughed, a sad, choking sound. “You make me happy, too.”
    “You’re not acting very happy right now.”
    “That’s because I feel like I shouldn’t be. I think I should feel guilty.”
    “But you don’t. That’s a good sign.”
    “Mmm,” he sighed, nuzzling my neck. “It’s hard when I can’t stop thinking about how good that felt.”
    “I figure by the time I do that to you two or three more times, we’ll have burned through the guilt.”
    “I’m just not sure it’s right. Not after what I did.”
    “You’ve wallowed in the guilt long enough. Yes, you made a mistake. But that doesn’t mean you have to punish yourself for the rest of your life. You deserve to be loved. And to be happy.” I kissed his forehead. “We both do.”
    He wasn’t ready to stop fighting—not quite