One Perfect Summer

inside my chest intensifies as I recall this last part. I barely see Jessie these days. It’s not a lie to say that he saved me. I miss Emily too.
    ‘You wanted answers,’ Lukas says quietly. ‘I wouldn’t let you seek them after we were married.’
    ‘I understand,’ I tell him.
    ‘Do you still need answers?’ he asks.
    I don’t reply for a while.
    ‘That’s a yes.’ He sounds hurt.
    ‘It’s not like I’m going to get them,’ I say swiftly. ‘He probably doesn’t even remember me.’
    ‘Of course he does,’ Lukas says, and there’s no bitterness in his voice. ‘No one could forget you.’
    A lump forms in my throat.
    ‘I love you.’ Tears fill his eyes.
    ‘Please don’t be upset,’ I beg.
    ‘You know,’ he says, laughing sharply, ‘I came home early to tell you that I’ve got a promotion.’
    ‘You’ve got a promotion?’ I sit up straight. ‘But that’s brilliant!’
    ‘It’s in Germany,’ he says dully.
    My stomach falls. ‘But I don’t want to live in Germany.’ I shake my head violently.
    He turns to face me. ‘I’ve lived in the UK for almost a decade.’
    ‘But we met here! You can’t expect me to leave my friends and family and move to another country.’
    ‘What friends?’ he asks gently. ‘You barely see them.’
    ‘That’s not my fault – you don’t like them. It’s hard for me to see them.’ I feel desperate.
    ‘What about my friends and family?’
    ‘But you bought into a life in England when you met me!’
    ‘Alice,’ he chides, ‘that’s not strictly true, is it? We’ve never explored the possibility of living in German—’
    ‘Exactly!’ I interrupt. ‘You can’t bring it up now, that’s not fair! What about my job?’
    ‘I was hoping you’d have a baby . . .’ He sees the look on my face. ‘But you could get another job as a teacher. Your language skills are coming along well—’
    ‘I didn’t even WANT to learn to speak German!’ I practically shout. ‘I wanted to learn to speak Mandarin!’
    He sighs and regards me. ‘Perhaps now is not the right time to talk about this.’
    ‘It will never be the right time to talk about it!’
    ‘Calm down.’
    ‘No!’
    I get up and start pacing the lawn, feeling like a caged animal. I can’t go to live in Germany. I can’t. I won’t!
    I realise I’m acting like a spoilt brat, but I can’t help it.
    ‘It’s a very good job,’ Lukas says. ‘It’s with LMU Munich.’ That’s the university. Hold on a moment . . .
    ‘But you told your father you refused to work there!’ I exclaim.
    ‘That was when he lined up the interview. This time it’s on my terms. It’s much more money,’ he adds.
    ‘I don’t care about the money,’ I snap.
    ‘Couldn’t we try it for a couple of years?’
    Oh, God, is he really going to make me do this?
    ‘When do you have to let them know?’ I ask.
    ‘I already have. I start in a month.’

 
    A week later one of Joe’s mates from Cornwall goes on live television to defend his old friend. It was supposed to be a very gentle piece about how he was always a good guy growing up. No one expected him to come out with the revelation that Joe’s brother had beaten him regularly as a child, while his parents did nothing to stop it.
    After the programme airs, Joe’s parents threaten to sue the TV station and the following outcry is enormous, but more witnesses come forward, including two people who were at the pub in Dorset the night that Ryan hit Joe over the back of his head with a bottle. Suddenly there are pictures everywhere of the back of Joe’s head, cropped in to show that the scar is still there underneath his short black hair. Anyone who’s ever had any sympathy for Joe’s parents, loses it. The tide has well and truly turned.
    Soon afterwards Joe goes on Oprah and his superstardom reaches new heights. He talks about his difficult upbringing, but doesn’t slate his parents, saying only that they’re not on speaking terms and haven’t been ever since the bottle incident when he was eighteen. Roxy and I watch the interview in the staff room the moment it’s loaded up onto You Tube.
    It’s a tiny screen and the quality is shocking, but both of us hang on every word. My heart goes out to him more than ever.
    ‘I bet you’re in his thoughts now,’ Lizzy says on the phone that afternoon, when clips from the Oprah interview are shown on the news. ‘I can’t believe you were there when his brother smashed his head