Pictures of Lily

money to the landlord and I’m in the process of slipping the change back into my purse when something makes me look to my left, to the other side of the wraparound bar. Ben is sitting there, staring into his drink. I’m rooted to the spot and in that moment he looks up and his expression must mirror mine before his face breaks into a wavering smile. I walk around the bar to where he’s sitting.
    ‘Hello,’ I say, hoping my voice doesn’t shake.
    ‘Hello.’
    ‘What are you doing here?’
    He lifts up his drink by way of explanation.
    ‘Is Dave here?’ I look around, but can’t see him.
    ‘No. Just me.’
    ‘In a bar? On your own!’ I exclaim. ‘Ben, I didn’t think you were the solo drinking type. You are drinking, aren’t you?’ I peer into his glass. It looks like whisky again.
    He takes a swig, but doesn’t reply to my question. Instead, he asks, ‘Are Michael and Cindy here?’
    ‘No, just Josh.’
    ‘You’re out alone with Josh?’ He frowns at me.
    ‘We’re on the lemon squashes, don’t worry.’
    ‘That’s not what I was worried about.’
    ‘What were you worried about?’ I give him a cheeky grin, but he doesn’t smile back. I suddenly feel full of a strange confidence. I don’t know what it is about him that makes me feel so up and down. ‘Come on, Norman No Mates, come and join us.’
    ‘I don’t want to interrupt anything.’
    ‘Don’t be ridiculous,’ I scoff, tugging him off his chair. ‘Come on.’
    Ben allows himself to be dragged reluctantly because he doesn’t have much choice. I budge up the bench seat so there’s room for Ben beside me, but he slides in opposite me instead. Josh returns to the table and I beam up at him.
    ‘I brought Ben over to say hi.’
    ‘Alright?’ Josh offers a lame smile and sits down next to me.
    ‘Hi.’
    ‘Are you eating?’ I ask Ben.
    ‘No.’
    ‘Go on, get something.’ I pass over a menu.
    ‘I’m not hungry,’ he says.
    ‘What?’ I cry. ‘Not hungry? That doesn’t sound like you. What’s going on?’
    Ben shakes his head in slight bemusement and takes a sip of his drink.
    ‘What’s this?’ Josh regards his lemon squash with disdain.
    ‘Lemon squash. You’re not drinking and driving me home,’ I state with determination.
    ‘Oh, for fuck’s sake.’
    And for the first time today, Ben gives me a genuine smile. I raise my eyebrows at him across the table. He looks down and then at Josh.
    ‘How’s work going?’ he asks.
    ‘Alright,’ Josh replies. ‘How’s yours?’
    ‘Fine.’
    ‘Aren’t you supposed to be moving to Pommieland soon?’
    ‘Yeah, in about two weeks.’
    ‘Nuts, mate, nuts. Who’d want to live in that grey old place?’ Josh nudges me, trying to wind me up. On the contrary. ‘When are you getting married to Kate Winslet?’
    ‘Charlotte.’
    ‘That’s the one.’
    She looks like Kate Winslet?
    ‘March.’
    ‘Good luck with that.’ Josh turns to me with a beguiling smile on his face and I try to ignore the sick feeling in my stomach. So she is beautiful. ‘Lils, you’re not really going to make me drink this muck, are you?’
    ‘Yes.’ Maybe she sounds like Kate Winslet .
    ‘Can’t I have one beer?’
    ‘No.’ Or it could just be that they’re both English?
    He puts his hand on my shoulder and gives it a squeeze. ‘Please?’ His brown eyes look so appealing and expectant that for a moment I waver.
    ‘No,’ Ben interrupts angrily.
    ‘Ben.’ My brow furrows. As if I can’t handle this.
    ‘What’s it to you, mate?’ Josh removes his hand and glares across the table at Ben.
    ‘Put your own life in danger, by all means. But don’t put Lily at risk.’ His dark-blue eyes glint with an unexpected menace and for a moment I forget that he’s getting married to the star from Titanic .
    Josh snorts and backs down. ‘Whatever.’
    ‘Here comes our food.’ I breathe a sigh of relief.
    Ben abruptly gets up. ‘I’ll leave you both to it.’
    I’d ask him to stay, but I can see that he won’t. ‘See you,’ I call after him instead.
    ‘What a wanker,’ Josh mutters to his departing back.
    ‘Don’t be an arse,’ I snap, getting up and going to sit opposite Josh because it feels too close for comfort beside him. The place where Ben was sitting is warm. I immediately realise my mistake. Now I’ve got my back to Ben at the bar and I can’t see him! I frown with annoyance at Josh, but then realise he’s still fuming about Ben’s comment so I change the