Pictures of Lily

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    ‘What are the others doing tonight? And no,’ I add wearily, ‘I don’t want to get into Shane’s pants.’
    ‘He wants to get into yours.’
    ‘Does he?’ I can’t keep the boredom from my voice.
    ‘Yep, but he doesn’t want to take away your virginity.’
    I let out a burst of laughter. ‘What? You’ve got to be kidding me.’
    ‘I’m not,’ he replies seriously.
    ‘Well, I’m not a virgin, so—’
    ‘ Aren’t you? ’ Josh interrupts, astounded.
    ‘No. But there’s no way in hell I’d sleep with him anyway.’
    ‘When did you lose your virginity?’ He’s still focusing on that statement.
    ‘None of your business. Eat up.’
    I myself do as I’ve advised and tuck into my pasta, but it’s hard to ignore the look on Josh’s face as he considers me. I don’t know what’s going through his head and I’m not sure I want to know. I’m still kicking myself that I have my back to Ben. After a while I sneak a peek to the place where he was sitting earlier. I can’t see him so I twist around further to search the entire bar area. Where is he? Did he go without saying goodbye? Maybe he’s gone to the toilet.
    ‘He left five minutes ago.’ Josh interrupts my thoughts.
    I spin around. ‘What?’
    ‘Ben. He just left.’ He takes a gulp of his lemon squash, pulls a face and gets to his feet. ‘Now I can get a proper drink without some know-it-all interfering.’
    ‘Josh, don’t,’ I cry in dismay, but he’s already at the bar. ‘ Don’t !’ I hiss at him. By the time he returns, I am simmering.
    ‘It’s only one beer, for fuck’s sake,’ he says.
    ‘I can’t believe you’ve just gone and done that.’
    ‘Chill the hell out! What’s the big deal?’
    ‘The big deal?’ I practically screech. ‘The big deal?’ The diners at the next table turn to look at me. ‘Bollocks to this!’ I clatter my knife and fork on my plate and slide out from my bench seat, wishing there was a chair here instead because it’s hard to look angry and bum-shuffle at the same time.
    ‘Where are you going?’ Josh asks in surprise.
    ‘Home, you fuckwit, even if I have to walk.’ I storm out of the restaurant and furiously dig out Mum’s mobile phone from my bag. I’m sure I’ve got a taxi number in here somewhere. I wonder if Ben has gone far? No. I can’t keep depending on him to rescue me, however much I’d like to.
    ‘Lily, don’t be ridiculous.’ I turn to see Josh standing on the pavement.
    ‘Piss off!’
    ‘Come on, I’ll drive.’
    ‘Did you drink that beer?’
    ‘Downed it in one.’ Pause. ‘I’m joking!’
    ‘This is no laughing matter.’ Again, people turn to stare.
    ‘Come on,’ he urges quietly. ‘Everyone will think you’re my bird and we’re having a bust-up.’
    ‘Fat bloody chance of that!’ But I allow him to manoeuvre me around the corner to the car park.
    I sit in silence for most of the journey home, still furious. Finally I decide I’m not ready to let it go. I know I’ve been in the car with him when he’s drunk a hell of a lot more than one beer, but suddenly I’ve had it up to my eyeballs.
    ‘Seriously, did you drink any of it?’
    ‘Any of what?’ he asks in frustration.
    ‘That beer!’
    ‘Are you still going on about that?’
    ‘Did you?’
    ‘I had a couple of swigs – so what? I’m not going to let a good beer go to waste.’
    ‘I don’t know why I ever got into a car with you,’ I say darkly as we exit Crafers and pass a koala warning sign. ‘You’re clearly not bothered about who or what you kill.’
    ‘Hey . . .’ he cautions.
    ‘Seriously, haven’t you ever wondered what it would be like to run over a child?’
    ‘Shut up!’ he says nastily.
    ‘You’d never forget it. You’d never get over it. It would ruin your life. All because you had one beer too many that impaired your reflexes.’
    ‘I’m not kidding, Lily. Shut. Up.’ We pull up outside his house.
    ‘What do you think your mum would say?’ My voice is deadly quiet, and he’s too shocked at the mention of her name to speak. ‘Do you think she’d be sad? Disappointed?’
    ‘That’s enough.’
    ‘Do you think she’d be proud of her son?’
    ‘GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY CAR!’ he suddenly bellows, roughly reaching across me to open my door. He pushes me out and I go with the motion, stumbling onto the pavement.
    ‘Josh!’ I cry out.
    But he’s already crashed the door shut in my face. He then revs the engine hard and noisily