Silencing Eve

was only seventeen. Do you remember that day? He looked like a movie star and could charm the birds from the trees. You were worried I’d be dazzled by him.”
    “And you were,” Eve said. “You were too young. I was grateful that he had some sense and walked away from you.”
    “I’m not. They were wasted years. Maybe if I’d followed him then, I’d not have become so set in my ways, and we’d have worked our relationship out earlier.” She gestured. “I know. What-ifs are useless. He’s gone, and I have to deal with it.”
    “Oh, Jane, it’s natural to have regrets.” She leaned back in the swing. “After I lost Bonnie, I thought I’d go crazy thinking about all the things I should have done and didn’t. She wanted a puppy, and I didn’t get it for her. I was going to get one for her that Christmas. But that Christmas didn’t come for her. There were so many things…”
    “You gave me my puppy, Toby, after I came to you. Was that why?”
    “Probably. I wanted desperately for you to be happy. I’d learned by then that you live for the day and not tomorrow.”
    “Because tomorrow might not come.” She looked out at the lake again. “But you think tomorrow did come, don’t you, Eve? You think Bonnie comes back to you.”
    “Yes,” Eve said quietly. “I know she does. I’ve never kept it a secret.” She paused. “But you have trouble believing it, so I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable by mentioning it.”
    “You know me, hardheaded realist. But if it brought you peace, I wanted you to have it. I wanted you to have anything that would make you happy.”
    “Peace and happiness … Yes, she brings me both.”
    “I … like the idea of death not being the end. I never thought much about it. I was too busy living. Now all of a sudden…” She had to stop again. “Trevor said he didn’t know anything about it either, but he thought there was something more…”
    “He was right.” She pulled Jane to her and nestled her head on her shoulder. “So much more, Jane. But no one can tell you. You have to find it for yourself.”
    “I guess so.” She could feel Eve’s heartbeat and smelled the clean smell of the soap she used. It brought comfort and healing to the aching void that seemed to span the world. “I can’t believe what you say about Bonnie. I’m sorry. I want so badly to believe it, but I can’t.”
    “Don’t be sorry.” Eve brushed a kiss on her forehead. “You don’t have to accept anything that I say except when I tell you that I love you. Now hush and try to relax. I want you to be able to sleep.”
    They were silent for several moments, listening to the cool breeze rustle the branches of the pine trees. How often during the past years had they been out here together, Jane thought. Talking, laughing at Toby’s antics, just unwinding from the day. She had never dreamed that one night she would be clinging to Eve and having a conversation that was this heartbreakingly painful. She should have known this day would come. Life was never perfect. She finally raised her head. “I’m keeping you up. You should be getting to sleep, too. Didn’t I see the FedEx man deliver something day before yesterday? Are you starting to work?”
    “Yes, providing you don’t need me. I can put it off.”
    “No, don’t let me get in the way. You’ve wasted enough time on me.” She jumped to her feet and pulled Eve up. “I guess I wasn’t thinking.” She grimaced. “Only feeling. Life goes on.”
    “It wasn’t a waste. It’s strange that the terrible thing that happened to me had a domino effect on the people who care for both of us. Friendships became stronger, characters became defined, confusion became clear. And you found and lost something pretty damn wonderful. Good or tragic, it wasn’t a waste. It made us stronger.” She put her arm around Jane’s waist as they walked toward the door. “And I needed the time to get my head together, too. Doing Kevin’s reconstruction was like nothing I’ve ever experienced. It will be good to get back to doing reconstruction on children instead of monsters.” She glanced at Jane as she opened the door. “Yes, life goes on. Bad, good, or indifferent. Whatever it is, we have to open our mind and heart to it.” She smiled. “Now I’m done preaching.” She gave a mock yawn. “Time I headed for bed before I get too disgustingly sanctimonious. Good night, Jane.” Her voice trailed behind her as she moved down the