Starry Night

Thirteen

    Carrie didn’t even bother to go to bed that night or the next, sleeping in fits and starts, a few minutes at a time. She sat up on her sofa with a quilt her mother had lovingly crafted for her while she was in college. With its thick warmth wrapped around her shoulders, she tried to digest what had happened between her and Finn, and what would happen next—if anything. Try as she might, she couldn’t make herself believe that the things he said had even the smallest semblance of truth.
    At seven Monday morning she tossed aside the quilt, and although she was bone tired, she readied for work. Staring at her reflection, Carrie did her best to disguise the dark circles beneath her eyes, but with little success.
    Sophie, who usually rushed into the office five minutes late, was already at her cubicle when Carrie arrived at hernormal time. Her friend had left several messages, but Carrie hadn’t answered her phone or responded to text messages.
    Sophie didn’t wait for Carrie to remove her hat and coat before she pounced on her, seeking information.
    “What happened Saturday night after Bruce and I left?” she demanded. “Why didn’t you answer any of my phone messages or texts?”
    Carrie stared back blankly.
    Sophie lowered her voice. “I feel terrible that Finn heard the things I said.”
    Fearing that if she said one word she would give in to the emotion that threatened to overwhelm her, Carrie simply shook her head.
    “You have to tell me,” Sophie pleaded. “Me and my big mouth. I’ll never forgive myself. How could I be so stupid?”
    Carrie swallowed against the tightening knot in her throat and gave an offhand shrug. “Apparently, you were right.”
    “Right?” Sophie’s jaw dropped several inches. “Right about what?”
    Bending over to turn on her computer, Carrie did her best to sound nonchalant and disengaged. “You might as well say ‘I told you so.’ Finn and I are over.”
    Sophie’s look of disbelief slowly evolved into a frown. “You’re kidding, right?”
    How Carrie wished she was. In answer, she shook her head. “Finn wanted to end it; he basically said the same thing you did, that we could never make it work, blah, blah, blah.”
    “Finn said that and you believed him? Listen, Carrie, I was wrong. Before I left I saw the way he looked at you. If a man ever looked at me like that, I’d be willing to give up chocolate and bear his children.”
    With all her heart, Carrie wanted to believe that was true, but she wasn’t sure it even mattered. Finn was gone. Nevertheless, she was hanging on to that slender thread called hope, only in her case it was ragged hope.
    Sophie pulled out a chair and sat down. “Anyone with two functioning brain cells could see he’s nuts over you.”
    “I’d like to believe you, I really would, but he left shortly after you did, and I haven’t heard from him since. Frankly I doubt that I will.”
    Sophie stiffened. “Fine, then write that article. He can’t treat you like that.”
    Why was it everything went back to that stupid article?
    “You’re going to do it, aren’t you? You’d be a fool not to.”
    Carrie didn’t need to think about it. Undoubtedly, it was what Finn expected of her. “I don’t want to talk about it.” Instead, she reached for her mouse and clicked on an email.
    “You’ve got to write it,” Sophie insisted.
    “No, I don’t.”
    “Are you off your rocker?” Sophie stood and did a complete three-hundred-and-sixty-degree turn. “Someone call a medic; Carrie’s losing her mind.”
    Carrie stopped her friend from making fools of them both. “Don’t you understand that’s exactly what Finn expects me to do?”
    “Then give him what he wants,” Sophie suggested. “That way you can both have what you want. Don’t be an idiot, Carrie. This opportunity is one that comes along once or maybe twice in a career. This is your chance to prove yourself to Nash.”
    “I can’t.”
    “Why not?”
    “Because Finn loves me.” It was the only scenario that made sense to Carrie. He had vehemently denied it, but Carrie refused to accept that. For two nights she’d mulled over his words, and ultimately she chose not to believe them. She couldn’t feel the things she did if it’d all been a lie.
    “Where is Finn now?” Sophie asked. “Let me talk some sense into him.”
    “Sophie—” Carrie really didn’t feel like discussing this now.
    “Is he still in Chicago?” Sophie asked, cutting her