The Forever of Ella and Micha

whisper, kissing her cheek. “And one day I want to be doing this exact same thing at our wedding.”

Ella
    “The Story” by Brandi Carlile plays through the room, soft lyrics that tell a story that hits straight at my heart. Micha is looking into my eyes deeply and winning my heart more than he already has.
    Then he tells me that he wants to do this exact thing at our wedding and my lungs compress. I want to run away and hide, but I fight to hold onto my sanity.
    “Micha, I—”
    He puts a finger over my lips. “Don’t say anything, okay? Just think about it for a while. I’m not talking about right this second. I just want you to know how I feel.”
    I lift his finger away. “I have to say this because it’s important that you know how I feel. I can’t do this right now.” His face falls as I continue. “But someday, yes. I need to get myself together first. I need to be okay with myself before I give you my whole heart.”
    He studies my face. “I’m not sure what you’re saying.”
    “I’m saying I think we should be friends until I can figure out how to get myself together again,” I explain. “I don’t want to do anything to hurt you, and right now I just don’t know if I can do that.”
    He cocks an eyebrow. “You want us to be friends? Because I’m not sure that’s possible.”
    “We have to, and then maybe one day down the road, after I’ve put my shit together, we can be more, but only if you still want to.” I summon a deep breath, my insides hurting as I add, “If someone better comes along, I don’t want you to hesitate because of me.”
    “No one else could ever be better than you,” he says, and I start to open my mouth to protest, but he talks over me. “But if that’s what you need, then I’ll do it. We can be friends… for a while.”
    He’s not completely committed, but I didn’t expect him to be. He’s the most determined person I know.
    I kiss his cheek and then place my head on his shoulder, breathing in the comforting smell of him as we sway in sync to the music, holding on, yet letting go.

Chapter 10
Micha
    It’s been a few days since Ella and I parted from the wedding, but it feels like months. We talk on the phone several times a day, but it’s not the same between us and I miss being with her.
    “Man, I’m so bored,” Ethan complains as he surfs the channels with his boots kicked up on the coffee table. “Can’t we just go do something?”
    I’m lying on my bed reading the message over and over again. A text showed up on my phone yesterday from my dad. It said he needed to see me—that he had something he wanted to ask. I’ve been staring at it, deciding if walking down that road with him again is a good idea. We’ve met two times and each one was uncomfortable and painful, but my mind won’t be able to settle until I know what he wants.
    “I don’t know… I guess we could go get something to eat.” Sitting up, I swing my legs off the edge of the bed, and text my dad, asking him where he wants to meet up.
    He texts me back quicker than I anticipated, asking me if I can meet him at the bakery up on Ninth Street in about an hour. Wavering, I finally text back that I will.
    “Never mind. I can’t go out.” I put on a black hoodie and zip it up. “I have to go meet someone.”
    He targets me with a condemning look. “A girl someone?”
    I scoop up the house keys from off the top of the dresser. “No, it’s just someone I used to know.”
    His face twists with confusion. “It’s not Naomi, is it? Because I’d like to advise that you stay away from that—she’s crazy. She basically tried to rape me last night.”
    “Like you didn’t like it.”
    “Hey, I like my women and everything, but she’s a little too much. She went from the bartender to some dude handing out flyers on the street to me. Besides, she has a thing for you.”
    “I know that.” I put my wallet into the back pocket of my jeans. “You weren’t the only one she hit on last night.”
    “Wow.” His eyes widen. “And I thought I was bad.”
    I stuff my phone into the pocket of my hoodie. “Can you do me a favor? Can you tell Dylan or Chase when—if—they show up, that I might not make it to practice?”
    He rummages through the very slim selection of food in the fridge. “Do you think they’ll show up? I mean, you haven’t seen anyone but Naomi since you got back and neither of them showed up to practice yesterday.”
    “I know that.” I open the