Unicorns? Get Real!

for royal princes across the lake. It would be the first time many of them would dance in high heels and “full pouffiness,” which meant wearing two or more crinolines under their ball gowns to make them stick out as far as possible.
    Suddenly there were yelps and shrieks.
    “Pileup!” Crispin cried out with excitement. More servants raced to the edge of the balcony.
    There was the blast of a whistle as Signor Pippinia, the dance master, raced to the center of the ballroom, where a heap of princesses lay sprawled atop one another.
    “There’s always at least two pileups. It takes the First Years quite a while to get the hang of dancing with the high heels. That’s why they always have the Third Years as their partners,” Gilly said knowingly to the other servants who stood near her. She was surrounded mostly by scullery girls, laundresses, and stable boys, who knew little of the royal activities, unlike she herself, who had served for several years now as a chambermaid.
    “All right, who’s taking bets here that it’s the Royal Princess Kristen who started this smashup?” a footman said. Footmen were almost as knowledgeable as chambermaids about the princesses. They were in charge of all princesses’ transportation, from carriages to horses, and they served princesses at formal occasions—banquets, tournaments, and similar events.
    “Oh my goodness!” Gilly moaned. She feared the footman was right. Princess Kristen from the Realm of Rolm was a wild princess if there ever was one. Charging across the ballroom floor as if she were on the jousting field, Princess Kristen had no use whatsoever for high heels, and she was definitely not accustomed to crinolines and full pouffiness. Leather jerkins, high boots, and wide-cut britches were her favorite clothing. She had protested mightily the entire time Gilly and another chambermaid were dressing her in the layers of crinolines. “Worse than a pony with a burr under its saddle,” Gilly had muttered, to which Kristen had replied, “I’d much prefer a burr to being smothered in all this.”
    Next they had attempted to teach her to walk in the high heels. But she balked at even taking a single step. “Stubborn as a royal mule, she is!” Gilly again muttered. First a pony and then a mule! Yes, Princess Kristen was the wild one of the group. Wild as any animal.
    When the princesses had arrived at camp for the first session, Gilly had prayed that the ones of South Turret, where she served, would not be snotty as the princesses from the previous summer. Well, the princesses were not snotty. They were as nice as could be. But they were also very independent-minded. Gilly knew for a fact that they often sneaked out at night. But she was no tattletale, and they didn’t seem any the worse for it. So why worry?
    In addition to the wild Princess Kristen, the South Turret was home to Princess Alicia of All the Belgravias—a real beauty, if there ever was one. Charming, delicate, but strong-willed in her own way. Then dear, squat Princess Gundersnap of the Empire of Slobodkonia, a war-inclined nation ruled by her fierce mother, the Empress Maria Theresa. Now there was an interesting princess. In all her years of being a chambermaid, Gilly had never had a princess like her. Gundersnap displayed not the slightest twinge of homesickness. And she constantly had to be reminded to write home.
    New to the South Turret this session was tiny Princess Myrella of the Marsh Kingdoms. In the previous session, the princess had had the unfortunate experience of turreting with two of the meanest princesses in the camp: Princess Morwenna and Princess Millicent. Alicia, Kristen, and Gundersnap had become good friends with Myrella and wrote to the Camp Mistress formally requesting, indeed begging, for Myrella to be transferred to their turret for this session. She was so tiny, and there was plenty of room, they argued. So it was arranged. Princess Myrella moved out of the North Turret, where she was replaced by Princess Zelenka, also quite nasty, who fit perfectly with the other two.
    Myrella was so happy to get out of the North Turret, she said she did not mind sleeping in the wardrobe closet at all, so it had been very plushly outfitted for her. There was a bureau in the closet with exceptionally large drawers. The royal carpenter had been summoned and had fashioned the top drawer into a lovely little bed for the tiny princess. The middle drawer had been turned upside down and