Whispers Under Ground

already by following you.’
    Lesley went quiet and I paused with the coffee halfway to my lips.
    ‘Go on then,’ I said.
    ‘Why do I have to do it?’ asked Lesley.
    ‘Because I went out last time,’ I said. ‘And I’m still freezing.’
    Lesley snarled but she got out of the car and while I finished my coffee she checked for bugs. She was back inside in less than two minutes with another identical GPS tracker.
    ‘ Voilà ,’ she said and dropped it into my palm. The casing was freezing – it must have been attached for ages.
    ‘Agent Reynolds,’ I said.
    ‘Or somebody else,’ said Lesley. ‘That we don’t know about.’
    I twirled the rectangular box in my hand. If it had been set up like ours, then it was probably programmed to send a signal if we started moving. Chances were if I deactivated it now the operator wouldn’t notice until she, or possibly a mysterious they, pinged it to check its operating status.
    ‘Should I fry it?’ I asked Lesley.
    ‘No,’ she said.
    ‘You’re right,’ I said. ‘Because if we destroy it they’ll know we know but if we keep it we have the option of feeding whoever it is false information. We could put the tracker on a decoy vehicle and send them on a wild goose chase or we could use it to set up a sting—’
    Lesley snorted.
    ‘We’re the police,’ she said. ‘Remember? We’re not spies, we’re not undercover and we’re conducting a legitimate investigation that’s been authorised at ACPO level. We want them to follow us so we can identify them, call for backup and arrest them. Once we have them in the interview room we’ll be able to tell who they are by what kind of lawyer turns up.’
    ‘My way’s more fun,’ I said.
    ‘Your way’s more complicated,’ said Lesley. She dug her finger under the edge of her mask where it itched. ‘I miss being a proper copper,’ she said.
    ‘Take it off,’ I said. ‘No one’s going to see you here.’
    ‘Apart from you,’ she said.
    ‘I’m getting used to it,’ I said. ‘It’s starting to become your real face.’
    ‘I don’t want it to become my real face,’ hissed Lesley.
    I replaced the tracker under the Asbo and we sat in stony silence while the main Nolan and Sons vans were loaded up and driven away. Finally Kevin did his rounds and returned, surprisingly, not with the bin bags of leftovers but with neatly loaded pallets on a forklift. His customers were truly getting the good stuff today. I jumped out of the Asbo, snapped some pictures with the long lens and dived back in again.
    ‘Turn the tracker on,’ I said.
    Lesley opened the laptop and tilted it to show me that the device was already activated and sending a signal every five seconds. I backed the Asbo out of its parking space and headed for the exit ramp. Using a tracker means you don’t have to crowd your target, but you don’t want to be too far away in case they suddenly do something interesting.
    Dawn brought a clear sky of dirty blue and illuminated a landscape of pockmarked snow and icy slush. Lesley and I instinctively hunched down into our seats as Kevin Nolan’s Transit lurched past. We waited until we were sure we knew which way he was turning on Nine Elms, and then we followed.
    It was all very civilised, but I still would’ve liked to have a pickaxe handle in the back seat – just for tradition’s sake, you understand.
    ‘Cultural weapon,’ I said out loud.
    ‘What?’ asked Lesley.
    ‘If the police had a cultural weapon,’ I said. ‘Like a claymore or an assegai – it would be a pickaxe handle.’
    ‘Why don’t you do something more useful,’ said Lesley. ‘And keep your eyes open for a car with diplomatic plates.’
    We were coming up on Chelsea Bridge, which for all its blue and white painted carriage lamp charm is only three lanes wide – two if you don’t count the bus lane. A good choke point to spot a tail.
    All diplomatic cars have distinctive plates which indicate status and nationality, for the ease and convenience of terrorists and potential kidnappers.
    I spotted a late-model dark blue Mercedes S class with a D plate and read the code out.
    ‘Sierra Leone,’ said Lesley and I felt a little borrowed patriotic tug.
    ‘Have you memorised all of these?’ I asked.
    ‘Nah,’ said Lesley. ‘There’s a list on Wikipedia.’
    ‘What’s the code for the US then?’ I asked.
    ‘270 to 274,’ said Lesley.
    ‘She’s not going to use an embassy car,’ I said. ‘Is she? I mean talk