Bullheaded

twist as he answered. “I wish he was still around to see me. Died a few years ago. But he was always proud of me, even when I wasn’t riding so well. Said there was a season for all things.”
    “I’m glad someone cared about you.”
    “Yeah, my mother loves me, but it’s different coming from a man. Ace was kind of like a father to me.”
    Cody remained silent for a respectful time before he asked, “After tonight you’re coming home with me, right?”
    Johnny had to smile at the hope and trepidation in Cody’s voice. “Nope, I got a job and it’s important to me. I’m part of the fighting team now. You’ve got to understand that. Tomorrow, when Vern leaves, I’m riding with him.”
    “I do understand,” Cody said. “I’m glad you’re so in love with what you’re doing. I wish I’d known all this earlier.”
    “It’s not all on you. I don’t talk about it much, but I’m glad you asked.”
    “And let me tell you, there’s a lot of people who know your name even if you’re not a famous rider. Every cowboy you keep from harm is going to remember you. They already trust you.”
    “Who says so?”
    “Bobby Blue, for one. After you saved his bacon in Tulsa, he tweeted about it. Other cowboys picked up on it and are watching what you do. You’ll make it to the finals for sure, and you won’t be riding my coattails. Dub said he voted for you to be one of the bullfighters.”
    “It’s good to know,” Johnny said. “Respect, huh?”
    “You know, Bobby Blue is kind of a jerk. Travis didn’t take to him much either on account of that whole black cowboy thing. But once you point out the error of his ways, the boy can learn.”
    “Yeah, guess he can.” It made Johnny happy to hear Cody finally admit Bobby Blue was a jerk, although it was too late, now that he’d started thinking of Bobby Blue as less of a jerk. Especially after Bobby Blue apologized.
    “He’s not the only one,” Cody said.
    “We both fucked up.”
    “I did more than you.”
    “I shouldn’t have run away. I should have said something.”
    “If you think I would have listened.” Cody sighed. “I guess I have to get better at it.”
    “You like it when someone tells you what to do?”
    “Hate it.”
    “Makes you want to do the opposite, right? Same goes for me.”
    “I guess any guy would feel that way. I’m going to be walking on eggshells for a while.”
    “It’s good for the balance. Maybe it’ll help you ride.” Johnny felt some satisfaction saying that, as if he were evening the score even if it was a little mean.
    “Why didn’t you say anything?”
    “I tried. You just kept talking over me. Telling me what to do. Instructing me!” Johnny reminded himself to breathe.
    “Respect,” Cody said heavily. “I’ve always had a lot of respect for you but I guess I didn’t show it very well.”
    “You figure this out on your own?” Johnny couldn’t keep the astonishment out of his voice.
    “I had a lot of help from your fan club.”
    “What fan club?”
    “Mom, Travis, RJ, Dub, Dad, Sam Wells. I could go on.”
    Feeling as if the wind had just been taken out of his sails, Johnny couldn’t hold on to his anger. His voice was mildly peevish. “You always had to be the star. I’m just wallpaper in the ring, and you can’t walk down the street without handing out millions of autographs.”
    “Depends on the street.” Cody laughed and told Johnny about his encounter with Jake the Cop. “He wasn’t so fucking impressed. He never heard of me or the NBR. It was a little bit of a wake-up call. We live in a small corner of the world.”
    “I guess I’ve got to stand my ground better.”
    “Like you do in the ring. You know I like sitting in the driver’s seat.”
    “And most of the time I’m okay with that,” Johnny said. “But when I speak up, you better listen.”
    “I can change.”
    “You have. I have too.”
    “Not too much.”
    “I used to be scared it was just sex keeping us together. I mean, we fuck and there’s always fireworks. The oxygen gets sucked out of the room and my brain—”
    “For me too, but it’s more than that for me,” Cody said, his face flushed as if it was still hard for him to say the words. “I never wanted to fall in love, especially while I was still riding, but I can’t imagine my life without you.”
    Johnny didn’t know what to say. Once he’d thought he couldn’t imagine a life without Cody, but he’d managed when they were apart. “It’s