Cook the Books

myself enough to explain that Digger had died in a fire. When I could finally breathe normally, I described the morning in detail. “And I can’t help worrying about Josh. Do you think I should get in touch with him?”
    “This is just terrible,” Ade said. “I’m in shock. What a horrible way to die! Oh, poor Digger. Well, do you have Josh’s new phone number?”
    “No. I think I still have his e-mail address, but that wouldn’t be right. I can’t send him an e-mail telling him that Digger is dead,” I said with a sniffle. “And I don’t want him to think that I’m using Digger’s death as an excuse to contact him. But maybe that’s what I want to do!” I wailed. Josh had been my rock for the past year; I was used to leaning on him. I still had Adrianna, but Josh had been a strong force in my life in a totally different way. I missed him more than ever. I missed him way too much for my own good.
    “Chloe, I hate to say this, because I can tell how much you want to talk to Josh, but you know he’ll hear about Digger from one of his friends. He knows tons of people in Boston, and he’ll hear. You’ve been working so hard to get over him.”
    I blew my nose. “You’re right. I’m moving on with my life. He moved on with his, right? He could have stayed in Boston instead of going to Hawaii without me, but he didn’t. I’ll just have to be sad about Digger without Josh,” I announced as defiantly as I could.
    “Listen, Chloe, I know you’ve had a crappy morning, but is there any chance you’d be up for doing me a favor?” I heard Patrick gurgling cutely in the background. “I hate to ask, but—”
    “Anything,” I said. “What do you need?”
    “I was wondering if you could watch the baby for me this afternoon? Just for a few hours? I’m so desperate to get out of the house for a little bit, and a girl I used to work with said she could squeeze me in for a cut and color at four today. She just called me to say she had a cancellation, but I totally get it if you aren’t up to it.”
    Not up to it? A few hours with the cutest cuddlebug in the world would cheer up and distract me. “I’d love to. Do you want to drop him off here? Around three thirty?” I turned a guilty eye to the hall closet, which was crammed full of outrageously expensive baby supplies. I’d paid for them with money that I still owed to the credit-card company, but I’d known that Patrick would spend time at my place and hadn’t wanted Ade and Owen to haul stuff back and forth. This occasion was an excellent example of why I needed the baby supplies; having Patrick here would justify my purchases as necessary expenses.
    “Are you sure you’re up for it?” Adrianna asked. “Because I could try to get another appointment.”
    “No way. I want time with my buddy,” I insisted. “See you then.”
    I took a scalding shower. Although the fire had been extinguished by the time I’d reached Digger’s, the horrible odor that had enveloped his street seemed to cling to me. I washed my hair twice and doused myself in orange-and-honey-scented bath gel. Later, I spent a few hours trying to focus on my schoolwork, but images of burning buildings won out against rational thought, and I made almost no headway in my reading. I scanned the notes I had taken on the clients I saw at my internship and tried to think about other people’s problems instead of my own.
    Just as I was setting up Patrick’s Pack ’n Play—a little portable crib and infant play area (not that I was expecting to let the gorgeous one out of my arms)—Kyle called.
    “Chloe, I am so sorry about this morning. Not only for the fire that killed your friend, but also for my father’s behavior. It’s the way he is, but it was inexcusable. I just dropped him at the airport, so at least he’s out of our hair for the time being.”
    My stomach churned when Kyle said killed, but I appreciated his apology. “Thanks so much. I’m still in shock,” I said. “I can’t really process what’s happened yet.”
    “Of course. Listen, if you’re up for it, I’d love to take you to dinner tonight. I have a seven o’clock reservation at Incline, in the Seaport district.”
    “That would be lovely,” I said honestly. “I’ll meet you there?”
    “I’ll come pick you up, if you like,” Kyle offered. Obbh... so maybe this was a date? “I have some more material to give you. The papers from the other night were only the tip of the iceberg. That