Honored Vow

important. Tell me where my mother is.”
    “She stayed with Kei in Chicago. Both of them were accepted into
    the tribe of Mnevis.”
    I nodded.
    “Her and Kei—they just don’t understand who you are or what you
    are, Jin. Did Logan tell you that he met them?”
    I caught my breath. “No.”
    “I figured.”
    “What happened?”
    He shrugged. “Kei and your mother, Ayumi, they were on their
    knees, and Logan asked them if they wanted to see you.”
    I waited for what I already knew.

    122

    Mary Calmes

    “Kei said you were dead to them, and your mother told Logan to
    cleanse the wickedness from his house.”
    I took a breath. There was a time when it would have hurt, but I was
    far too insulated by Logan’s love for it to touch me anymore. “And what
    did the semel-netjer do?” I smiled at him.
    He cleared his throat. “He said how sorry he was for both of them,
    and the way he looked at them…. Jin, it was like they were both dying
    there in front of him. When he walked away without a word, like they
    were nothing, everyone was stunned, you know? I mean, to a panther, to
    have a semel look at you like that, not even acknowledge you or dismiss
    you… God. It was so horrible, and he did it, just removed his regard, you
    know? And he’s the only one, the only semel-netjer in the world, but I
    think it’s like Yuri said.”
    “What did Yuri say?”
    “He said that they cannot comprehend that you are a reah and a
    nekhene, and because they don’t really see you, Logan can’t fathom their
    existence at all.”
    I sighed deeply. “Sounds like Yuri.”
    “I was just floored. I mean they could have—they could live here
    with you and Logan, they are both related to the only nekhene cat in a
    thousand years.”
    “But all they see is a gay man,” I told him. “And that’s fine, because
    gay is a word that can be used to define me. It’s not all I am, but it is a
    facet of the whole.”
    “They don’t understand,” he said, shivering.
    “And that’s okay,” I sighed, patting his hand before I stepped away
    from him. “Because I have a family of my own that accepts and loves
    me.”
    “It still has to hurt Jin, be honest.”
    “I am,” I assured him. “They left me for dead, and the only one who
    came to for me was Crane.”
    “Crane?”
    “Yeah. He replaced them all—mother, brother, father, there’s only
    him now.”
    “Your father said that he was glad that your grandmother didn’t live
    to see the abomination that you grew into.”

    Honored Vow

    123

    I chuckled. “Well, it would be funny for him to know that my
    grandmother, his mother, is the one that told me that it was okay that the
    first person I ever had a crush on was one of the khatyu in the tribe.”
    “She knew you had a crush on a guy?”
    “Yes, she did, because I told her.”
    “What did she say?”
    “She said what she always said—that my love was a gift, and
    whoever was lucky enough to get it should count themselves blessed.”
    “She sounds like she was wonderful.”
    “She was.”
    He cleared his throat. “Can I ask what happened to the guy you had
    your first crush on? I might know—”
    “He died a long time ago.”
    “How?”
    “I mean, to me.” I smiled gently. “He was one of the men who beat
    me when I turned into a reah for the first time in front of others.”
    “Oh God, Jin, to have someone you—”
    “My parents are the bigger tragedy,” I assured him. “My brother….
    But you’re getting upset over ancient history.”
    “You’re lying if you say it doesn’t bother you.”
    My eyes flicked to his, and he shivered.
    “I’m sorry, my reah, I forgot my place for—”
    “It’s fine; you can believe what you want. But what’s true is that I’m
    the reah of my tribe and I don’t have time to live in the past. I have people
    to take care of, a best friend to help heal, and a mate to defend. I have
    people who love me now; I don’t have time to worry about people who
    wish I was dead.”
    He studied me, looking for a lie on me. But he wouldn’t find one. I
    had closed the door on my past, finally, when my father had first visited
    me after Logan and I were mated. The door had been sealed in Sobek after
    both my father and Crane’s had spoken to the priest. I wished that after I
    knew the hatred that lived in both men’s hearts, Crane had not fallen into
    their hands. I would give anything to have kept him safe.
    “Oh God, Jin.”
    If I had only been able to