The Class Menagerie

VanDyne.“
    They were always nasty-polite to each other Jane had first met Mel when Shelley’s cleaning lady had met a bad end in Shelley’s guest room. They had “taken exception“ to each other, to put it mildly, then and didn’t seem to be able to get over it. Jane led the way to the library amid a hum of speculation from the Ewe Lambs, and closed the door.
    Mel closed the door and then grabbed Jane by the shoulders. He looked as if he was debating between shaking her hard and hugging her. Finally he just released her, sighed, and sat down in one of the leather sofas. “So, Jane, what the hell are you doing finding bodies?“ he said with forced calm.
    “It’s not as if I meant to, Mel. I’d have been thrilled if somebody else had found her.“
    “And so would I! I hate that you were here at all where somebody’s been killed. Try to be very precise and tell me what’s going on here,“ he said, taking out a notebook and clicking a nice gold pen. Jane found herself thinking it looked like the kind of pen people only had as gifts and wondered who gave it to him.
    “Okay, Shelley went to a high school here that had a big fire and since the high school reunion is taking place this weekend, she invited some of the women in a do-gooder club they had in school to come early and plan fund-raising.“ He wrote for a moment and glanced up at her, smiling. “That was concise! Now, what have you got to do with it?“
    Jane explained how she’d been roped into helping Edgar and being Shelley’s “date.“ This wasn’t quite as concise, but she managed it fairly well.
    “Who’s the one in the carriage house? What do you know about her?“ Mel asked.
    “She’s just one of them. A nasty one, actually. She was being very unpleasant yesterday.“
    “Is that when they all came?“
    “Yes, at various times during the day.“
    “When did you last see her? The victim?“
    “You say ‘victim’ as in murder? She didn’t die of natural causes, then?“
    He didn’t even respond to this except to cock his eyebrow.
    “I see,“ Jane said. “Let me think... I don’t know exactly when I last saw her. She was at dinner. She was making nasty cracks to people off and on all evening. But everybody was milling around. Going upstairs for things, talking in the library and the living room. Coming in and out of the kitchen. I was mostly in the kitchen and only saw the people who came through there.“
    ‘Try to pin down the last time you’re sure you saw her,“ Mel insisted, not sympathetic to Jane’s excuses.
    “Okay. Dinner for sure. That was at seven. I came in the kitchen just after Lila had been trying to goad · Mimi Soong about something. That’s the last time I actually saw her.“
    “When was that?“
    “I have no idea. I wasn’t paying any attention to the time. Oh, wait. Pooky came in a little bit after that and Lila had been harassing her and Pooky said she wanted to go outside for some air and Edgar said he wasn’t going to lock up for an hour yet, so it must have been about nine-thirty because he locked up at ten-thirty, just after I got back.“
    Mel had been staring at her intently. “Pooky?“ he said, pronouncing it very carefully.. “That’s somebody’s name?“
    “A nickname, I think. A couple of them go by nicknames. Lila was actually Delilah, I think.“
    “All right, give me a rundown on who’s attending this thing, who was in the house last night.“
    “Me, for one.“
    “What about Mrs. Nowack?“
    “She had to go home to wait for a phone call from her husband. And of course, Edgar and Gordon were here. It’s their house.“
    “The guests...?“ he prodded.
    “All right, there was Lila. I can’t remember her last name, though. And Beth... uh, Vaughn, I think. She’s the one who’s a judge. Very square, sensible, low-heeled shoes, graying hair.“
    VanDyne closed his eyes for a second, then nodded, as if he’d seen her in the kitchen and identified her.
    “And Crispy. I’m sorry I’m rattled. I can’t remember her real name either. Her maiden name was Crisp. She’s the little stylish one with the spike heels, frosted hair, and incredible fingernails. Avalon Smith is the one with the sloppy dark red hair and potato sack clothing. She’s from Arkansas.“
    “Who else?“
    “Pooky is that poor woman with the horrible facelift that went wrong and the stiff blond hair that looks like a bad wig. She seems to be stunningly stupid, so keep that in mind when you talk