Lucy in the Sky

Andie.
    ‘Bye, Andie.’
    ‘Bye.’ She smiles sleepily up at me.
    ‘Hope to see you soon.’
    She doesn’t answer.
    ‘Aah, she’s tired, poor little mite,’ Sheila says.
    ‘Bye, both of you. Lovely to see you again.’
    ‘You too, Lucy. Good luck with everything.’
    After I’ve said my goodbyes to all the hens I’m not quite sure what to do with myself. I don’t feel comfortable walking back to Nathan and Amy’s group now so I go and wait by the wall overlooking the harbour and stare at the city lights until Molly and Sam reappear, fifteen minutes later.
    ‘I love you,’ Molly says, squeezing me tightly.
    She releases me to Sam and he holds me close in his strong arms. I break away after a moment and pull Molly in, in a three-way hug.
    ‘Don’t leave it so long, okay?’ Her voice is barely audible as she presses her face into my hair.
    ‘I won’t. I’ll be back before you know it.’
    We let go of each other and look over to the other side of the marquee where the little red train has pulled up, on loan from the gardens for the night. Molly and Sam climb onto it and the waiting guests start to clap and cheer as the driver pulls away. Someone has tied cans to the back of the last carriage and they clank together noisily.
    But when the laughter from the guests dies, and the train disappears around a corner, taking my best friends in the whole world with it, I’m besieged with an overwhelming sadness. I feel lost. Totally lost.
    ‘Alright, Lucy?’ It’s Molly’s uncle, Ken. ‘You ready to go to your hotel now? We’ll catch a cab out at the front.’
    I’m staying the night in a hotel so as to be well placed for a taxi to the airport in the morning. It’s not the same one as Sam and Molly’s–that was too pricey–but it’s nice enough.
    ‘It’s alright, Ken, we’ll take her.’ Nathan appears by my side, closely followed by Amy, and my heart immediately lifts.
    ‘Are you sure?’ Ken asks me.
    ‘Yes.’ I nod brightly.
    ‘Well, your suitcase is already there, dear, so you just have to check in.’
    I thank him. He was kind enough to drop my luggage off for me at the hotel earlier.
    ‘Okay?’ Nathan asks, glancing down at me. If only we didn’t have Amy with us, but I’m so glad we’re not saying our final goodbyes just yet.
    ‘Nathan and I don’t have long if we’re going to catch the last ferry,’ Amy enlightens me. She seems more confident somehow, and I’m not sure why.
    Nathan hails a cab and opens the door while Amy and I climb in. She stays seated in the middle, obviously expecting him to go around to the other side, but he leans in and tells her to budge up, so she moves over to the window. I shift along and sit in the middle, between them.
    ‘Harbour Rocks Hotel, please,’ I tell the driver. None of us really speaks on the way there. The warmth of Nathan’s leg is pressing into mine and I can feel his chest rise and fall with every breath. I’m jittery inside. I so want to reach down and take his hand. He’s looking away from me, out of the window. I follow his gaze to the city towering overhead.
    Nathan insists on paying the driver and comes back to my door to help me out, even though I’m already stepping onto the pavement. His touch on my bare arm leaves it burning. I wonder if I’ll feel like this next time I see him. Will I feel like this about anyone ever again?
    All three of us go up to the front desk and they wait with me while I check in, Amy shuffling from foot to high-heeled foot impatiently as Nathan stands beside me.
    ‘You should check out the Gumnut Café round the corner for breakfast. Dad used to take me there.’
    ‘Okay.’ I smile up at him.
    ‘We’d better go,’ Amy urges Nathan. ‘We’re going to miss the last ferry.’
    He turns to me. ‘Are you going to be alright tomorrow?’
    ‘Yeah. It’ll be easy to hail a cab from out there.’ I motion to the doorway.
    ‘Well, okay, then.’
    It’s awkward for a moment. Do we hug? Kiss? Instead I turn to Amy.
    ‘Bye, Amy.’ She gives me a little hug.
    I withdraw and turn to Nathan.
    ‘Bye,’ I say, and he leans down to me and I up to him as we hug quickly, unfulfillingly, with Amy standing by. They turn to leave, she looking up at him, he not looking back at me, me watching them push out through the glass doors.
    Then suddenly he’s back and my heart soars.
    ‘I almost forgot to give you this.’ He presses something into my hand. I look down. It’s the cassette tape from