Monstrous Regiment

the Igors.
    They waited. Occasionally an officer would glance at them and go back to looking at a map or talking. Then Polly saw some whispering going on, heads turned again, and there was a drift toward the semicircle of seats. There was a definite sense that here was a tiresome chore that, regrettably, had to be done.
    General Froc did not look directly at the squad until he had taken his seat in the center of the group and adjusted his papers neatly. Even then, his eye passed over them quickly, as if it was afraid to stop.
    Polly had never seen him before. He was a handsome man and still had a fine head of white hair. A scar down one side of his face had just missed an eye and showed up against the wrinkles.
    “Things are moving well,” he said to the room in general. “We have just heard that a flying column led by the remnant of Tenth are closing on the Keep and attacking the main gates from outside. Someone must have seen what is happening. The army is on the move!”
    There was a certain amount of refined cheering at this, none of it from the squad. The general glanced at them again.
    “Is this all of them, Clogston?” he said.
    The major, who at least had a small table to himself, stood up and saluted.
    “No, sir,” he said. “We are awaiting—”
    The doors opened again. Jade was brought in, chained between two much larger trolls. Maladict and Blouse trailed behind her. It seemed that in all the rush and confusion no one had found any trousers for Blouse, and Maladict looked slightly blurred. His chains jingled constantly.
    “I object to the chains, sir,” said Clogston.
    The general held a whispered consultation with a few of the other officers.
    “Yes, we do not want undue formality,” he said, nodding at the guards. “Remove them. You trolls can go. I just want the guards to remain on the door. Now, let us proceed. This really shouldn’t take too long. Now then, you people,” he settled himself in his chair, “this really is very simple. With the exception of Lieutenant Blouse, you will agree to be returned to your homes and placed in the charge of a responsible male, understood? And no more will be said about this matter. You have showed considerable spirit, there is no doubt about that, but it was misplaced. We are not ungrateful, however. We understand that none of you are married, and so we will present you all with suitable, indeed, with handsome dowries—”
    Polly saluted. “Permission to speak, sir?”
    Froc stared at her, and then looked pointedly at Clogston.
    “You’ll have a chance to speak later, Corporal,” said the major.
    “But what exactly have we done wrong, sir?” said Polly. “They should tell us!”
    Froc looked at the far end of the row of chairs.
    “Captain?” he said.
    A short officer got to his feet. In Polly’s face, the tide of recognition raced across the mudflats of hatred.
    “Captain Strappi, political division, sir—” he began, and stopped at the groan from the squad. When it had died away, he cleared his throat and went on: “Twenty-seven Abominations have been committed under Nugganatic law, sir. I suspect there have been many more. Under military law, sir, we have the simple fact that they posed as men in order to join up. I was there, sir, and saw it all!”
    “Captain Strappi, may I congratulate you on your rapid promotion?” said Lieutenant Blouse.
    “Yes, indeed, Captain,” said Clogston. “Apparently you were a humble corporal only a few days ago?”
    Plaster dust drifted down again as something heavy struck the wall outside. Froc brushed it off his paperwork.
    “Not one of ours, I hope,” he said, to a certain amount of laugher. “Do go ahead, Captain.”
    Strappi turned to the general. “As you know, sir, it is occasionally necessary for us in the political division to assume a lower rank in order to gain intelligence. Covered under the regulations, sir,” he added.
    The look that General Froc gave him stirred a little teacup of hope in Polly’s breast. No one could like something like Strappi, not even a mother. Then the man turned back to Clogston.
    “Is this germane, Major?” he said testily. “We know they disguised themselves as—”
    “—women, sir,” said Clogston smoothly. “That’s all we know, sir. Apart from Captain Strappi’s assertion, and I intend to suggest later that this is tainted, I haven’t yet heard any evidence that they have dressed in any other way.”
    “We have the evidence of our own