The pilot - Der Pilot (eng-deu)

leave us alone.”
    â€œYou need to sleep, your Lordship”, sagte Stefan. “We can talk tomorrow.”
    Chesterfield maß ihn mit einem zutiefst missbilligenden Blick. Stefan sah Shaw Hilfe suchend an, doch der zuckte nur müde die Achseln. Er war sichtlich am Ende seiner Kräfte.
    Stefan seufzte. “Doctor Shaw, please give me a minute with Lord Chesterfield in private. Might I make a suggestion? Why don’t you go to the kitchen and see if you can get something to eat.”
    Der Arzt klopfte Stefan auf die Schulter, bevor er aus dem Raum ging und leise die Tür schloss. Das Getuschel der Diener ebbte ab, bis endlich nur noch Chesterfields schwere, rasselnde Atemzüge zu hören waren.
    â€œAre you thirsty, your Lordship?”, fragte Stefan. Chesterfield nickte und trank gierig, als Stefan ihm das Wasserglas an die Lippen hielt. Dann sank er ermattet zurück.
    â€œI heard your fight ... with Margaret.”
    â€œI’m sorry for what I said to her. I had no right to speak to your daughter like this.”
    â€œI’m not angry. Everything you said was true.”
    Um sich zu beschäftigen, öffnete Stefan das Fenster. Frische Abendluft streichelte seine Wange und milderte den Geruch von Krankheit und Tod. Er kehrte zum Bett zurück und setzte sich auf den Stuhl daneben.
    â€œHow do you feel?”, fragte er matt.
    â€œCan’t feel ... my legs.” Der Schatten eines Grinsens verzerrte Chesterfields Lippen. Auch Stefan lächelte tapfer, obwohl ihm zum Heulen zumute war.
    â€œHow was your flight?”
    â€œFantastic. Had a ... → crash landing , though.” Chesterfield leckte sich über die rissigen Lippen, und Stefan half ihm erneut beim Trinken. “Thought I ... → spotted an enemy. Tried to shoot him down. The rest ... is black.”
    â€œThe bullet ricocheted from the propeller. You managed to hit yourself. How could that have happened?”
    â€œThe inter ... interrupter gear only works ... when the engine is running. How silly of me to forget that!”
    â€œIt was an accident.”
    â€œAn accident, yes.” Chesterfield nickte. “My wound ... is it bad?”
    Stefan legte alle Zuversicht, die er aufbringen konnte, in sein Kopfschütteln.
    â€œI see.” Der Alte blieb erstaunlich gefasst.
    Stefan musste über Chesterfields eigenartige Formulierung nachdenken. “You thought you spotted an enemy? Did you or didn’t you?”
    â€œNo, I didn’t. I thought I did, for a moment, but I was mistaken.”
    â€œDon’t you remember what Bishop said?”
    â€œThat your father ... shot me down? I do remember.”
    â€œWell, then, I’d better go now, your Lordship.” Stefan wollte aufstehen, doch Chesterfields “Stay here” ließ ihn innehalten.
    â€œI shot down ... three dozen men. How many of them were fathers? Twenty? Twenty-five?”
    â€œBut he shot you down, your Lordship. He took your legs.”
    â€œI was a pilot. I knew the risk each ... time I took off. Even today. Every pilot knows he’ll crash some day. Your father knew that, too.”
    â€œBut he didn’t die in the crash. It was ...” Stefan stockte.
    â€œIt was your fault?”
    Stefan nickte.
    â€œIdiot”, raunzte Chesterfield aus vollem Herzen. Hätte ihn seine Schwäche nicht zum Flüstern gezwungen, es wäre kein Unterschied zu seinen sonstigen Schimpftiraden zu erkennen gewesen. “It was not your ... fault, you stupid fool. Nobody would have found that ... bullet under his burns. Come ... to your senses, man, and stop blaming yourself. It’s time to let go.”
    Stefan sah unsicher auf Chesterfield hinab. “Sorry, your Lordship, but it isn’t easy. You may think so but ...”
    â€œYou believe it, too”, murmelte Chesterfield. “You’re just too → thick-witted to realize. That’s why you need me ... to tell you.”
    â€œSo you think that because you’ve told me not to feel guilty any more, I won’t?”
    â€œYes”, sagte Chesterfield mit großem Ernst.
    Stefan antwortete nicht darauf.
    â€œYou’re a good man, Stephen. You’ve done a lot for me, and ... I don’t think you realize how much. Thank you for being there for me. And ... I’m sorry.”
    â€œSorry, your Lordship? For what?”
    â€œFor → provoking you. I wanted to push you over the edge, and I